krrris

2011-09-06T19:44:00.002+08:00

What up.

So exams are over, hols are here, I wanna find a new job cuz I'm not keen on going back to a busy restaurant with little pay, but thinking that I've got CCA, chalet outings and all.. I don't know. All I know is I wanna earn extra cash to spend some on, and not idle my time away rotting at home.

I should say life in a Polytechnic's much more manageable than in a JC's. Though it is definitely more tiring, cuz there's more projects always due about the same week and stuff, but yeah much more manageable considering I have a fair amount of interest in my course compared to the subjects I was taking in JC. So yup, I really feel fortunate that I left.

I've always like to dance. I knew since young I had that interest since I bobbed wobbled turned around when there was music, but i guess that's what all normal kids do don't they. But in secondary school, I was pretty sure I'd like to improve myself on hip-hop especially. SRJC didn't offer hip-hop so I rather not try out contemporary-ballet at all. Yes I am not versatile that's why I never thought I was a good dancer. And then over here I got into NRA, but honestly everything feels different. I don't feel as confident as compared to how I was, I don't deliver well and I always feel inferior and there was pressure. Since when should your interest exude stress? I ask myself. Shouldn't it be a form of relieving stress? And so along the way I felt doubtful, I even thought of joining a sports CCA since I liked playing sports as well.

But, thankfully for the dance camp, I became pretty sure of myself again, and learnt that perhaps not all people are so judgmental. At least that's what I think now thats making me feel better. We make mistakes, some people learn fast, some people learn slow. That's how it is. It's like doing projects, you can't expect everyone to be at the particular level of speed in terms of efficiency.

I dreaded attending the camp at first honestly. Because I was a little lazy of making new friends and going through the same old motion of "Hi what's your name What's your course Where do you live" kinda conversations. I was afraid of the intimidation I would feel from all those strong dancers around me. And I'll say I'm a little ashamed of myself for thinking so.

Been sucha long time since I performed in front of a crowd. Though it wasn't smooth and perfect, thinking back, the experience was nice. Really nice. I've just got so much more to learn and improve on.

NATIONALDAY.

2011-08-09T15:11:00.002+08:00

Happy 46th Birthday Singapore!!

Just saw this tweet my friend retweeted: "This is home truly, where I know I must study".

Makes so much sense. Haha.

And that's exactly what I'm (trying) doing right now.

I've got 4 examinable modules this term and 2 of them I have totally not yet studied for before cuz they weren't tested last term, diediedie.

My pimples popping out like funfair. Must be due to the lack of sleep during the month of July, (thankful that it's over so are the fucking projects) + my period.

Sometimes I wonder if I know myself well enough. At a certain time I can say and act according to how my mood goes, but normally afterwards I'd be thinking, was it necessary? Should I have done/said that? And then I'd feel bad or shitty or whatsoever.

I think deep down I'm not that person who's as firm as I thought I am. Cuz I give in to my own doubts.

2011-06-06T16:45:00.002+08:00

Whazzupppp.

Haven't been blogging for awhile, so right now I'm having common test week, but I've only got modules that are tested on, hehe :)

I'm in dance anyway! :) Really happy when I got to know. But however, I don't feel as confident because I'm in a totally different environment with people I don't know and they're much better. I feel inferior. Plus the fact that I haven't been dancing for 2 years. And I'm not versatile at all. I don't have any technique :/

Other than that, I'm loaded with assignments and projects. Group assignments especially. I h8 them because there are bound to be people who feed off your efforts and sit there and smile because everything's managed to be done in the end. They can go ride on top a cactus.

How nice if it was mutual.

I saw it.

2011-05-09T23:11:00.002+08:00

Deep down I know its much more than how i put it across.

I think i really, really have to be less dependent on people with my own little emotional rollercoaster ride.

It is hard because someone whom you used to talk to everyday without giving a fuck to the words you say, has now become someone who talks to you... for just a fair bit added on with circumstances which both parties didn't anticipate. And there's the awkwardness of it all, adding on to the why-we-don't-talk-as-much.

So mind boggling for me because... I was the one who deemed the end.

-

And the workload from school isn't helping AT ALL.

2011-04-16T16:38:00.002+08:00

You're clever. But no matter what, I'm not stupid. I wonder when you would get to taste your own medicine.

2011-04-10T21:58:00.002+08:00

Poly's starting in a week. Oh my god time passes sooo fast. So to sum it all up, I've just stopped working. It's been great for a first job. I get the experience + some happy memories + new friends + some kaching. If it's not for work, I think I'd be crying everyday. (Boredtotears) I went back to SRJC to get some happy news. I got an A for Project work. Kicked this pain in the ass subject in the ass. Though it doesn't have to matter to me anymore because it's really of no use, I still feel happy knowing my most of my friends had As. Plus given the amount of effort I had put in, I think I do deserve an A. :) I'm half excited + half skeptical for school. But at least, I'm still half excited. I remember I wasn't even excited last year when I had to go to JC. And I think negative energy was pretty much constantly there for me. I guess if not for certain experiences and people, i wouldn't be skeptical. I wouldn't. Tata.

2011-02-19T23:00:00.000+08:00

Not good enough.

2011-02-13T00:53:00.002+08:00

Workearnmoneyandbuywhatiwantsave.

That's about 80% of what i'm thinking about nowadays.

Work's better than I expected! Nice people, easy to talk to and i like it. Most important factor. I like it. True that I'm not in need of money, so it doesn't matter that much. I rather be kept a little busy than sit down whole day and stare into blank space. It's gonna bore the hell out of me.

Plusplus today I received 30 bucks just for an hour of tasting drinks. Lucky I didn't have my breakfast so the drinks plus 2 biscuits served as that.

Wo xiang kan dian ying.

Not so confused anymore.

2011-01-23T15:11:00.002+08:00

I thought I was pretty good at seeing or telling who to trust and who not to.
I've been proven wrong.

How nice. :>

MEISCONFUSED.

2011-01-19T22:10:00.003+08:00

I admit I haven't officially put my stamp on staying in a JC or switching to a Poly. And hell yes I am very irritated with myself because I am sucha indecisive sucka.

Bbbbbut this is so important to me, I can't afford to make a decision sloppily! (Though I've already spent near a month thinking and thinking)

So I guess it's time I make my choice and stick to it. Plus with that slap for wasting a year away, I should really stop procrastinating, lazing around and start taking things more seriously.

I realise things are always easy to picture and to say you're gonna accomplish this&that at the spur of the moment. But once you get down to it, you'll get tired, distracted, you'll lose motivation along the way and eventually you'll just stop to take a break. After that break, there's no discipline to continue anymore because you're used to being comfortable in that zone. I just hope that doesn't happen to me again for the millionth time. I am always like that.

-

Generally speaking, sometimes I think guys make better friends because I can say whatever I want to them and they're less petty. They're not sly people who have things up their sleeves and would tell you how they feel too.

2011.

2011-01-03T15:40:00.005+08:00

Happy New Year everybody!

So, my last post was more than a month ago...

I went to LaoCai, Vietnam for 9 days. Eye opening experience. Life in the village is really simple and laid back.This is one of my favourite villages we visited - Tar Van Village. Environment there's relatively clean plus food was nice. Luvvv it.

View outside the bus after we left Tar Van Village in the morning.

The first half of the trip was pretty exhausting, climbing the mountain and stuff. I didn't manage to make it to the peak. But completing about 3/4 of the journey's enough for me. Physically.

We did quite a lot of CIP mostly involving children. Priceless smiles on their faces, I wouldn't exchange them for anything else.

So I learnt that we should be appreciative of what we have - cliche things you say after visiting a less developed country.

But there's another thing which hit me harder, character.

Through the trek up the mountain, a sprained ankle and a fever, I could then really tell who are the people that would be there for other people regardless, and who are the people who just couldn't care less and put themselves as priority.

Pretty sad to know, but who cares.

Celebrated New Year's Eve and the first few hours of 2011 at Marina Barrage!

All the small things.
I certainly do not have nice pictures of the fireworks, everybody was jumpin around screamin'. So was I.

Would I go to a poly or stay in a JC? That I'm not sure still.

I just hope 2011 wouldn't be like 2010. Really.

2010's definitely not a happy year for me.

I've got trouble being my true self, and I miss me. I've had people entering my life and I was eager and hopeful. How bout now I tell you I can't figure out who to trust. I tried my best, I did.

It's either I learn about things from others, or they just show their flaws in front of me.

I can't blame them for not understanding me, since I never meant to open up much in the first place. They can see me as a crazy bitch throwing random tantrums out of nowhere and be alrightok the next second. For all they want.

But i don't like being misunderstood.

2010-11-20T22:00:00.002+08:00

Sometimes explaining too much is redundant, and all the more you sound like you're coming up with an excuse.

-

I'm am blooooody tired. Went trekking at Bukit Timah Hill again and we did 9 sets all together i almost died k no.

I'm kinda worried honestly. Because I always have this urge to vomit. And when I reach home, I have slight headaches which i need to sleep off. I don't feel all that well even after sleeping. So.. I wonder how i'll cope for the 3 days in the mountain :/

-

Not prepared for next year.

2010-11-03T21:08:00.002+08:00

PW all day long now. I'm so sick of it. Keep editting my script and shit. Plus I am not done in memorizing all of it. OP's exactly one week away. Omg hope my hands don't tremble.

-

So my days have been screwed up by PW and at this time, another little bitch comes along the way.

Good that I don't have to see her so much next year and hear so much of her stupid questions about me. And her sly methods to try dig up smth from people. What a slut trying to act naive. Too bad her over-sensitive and possessive character gave her away.
She has to know she's the one having a problem with my attitude.

-

Do circumstances change people? I feel like i'm changing. I didn't choose to; it is gradual.

2010-10-24T16:50:00.002+08:00

I've lost the mood to do anything.
Maybe I can spend my whole day watching tv.
But I've got stuff I have to do eg: Project Work.

So i guess i shouldn't have wasted my time away during semester 1. Or i should have worked harder in semester 2. Okay whatever. I'm alright with these regrets because i am so used to this.
I rmb i said i don't wanna retain. I mean who the fuck does. It's just this stupid impact it gives me that brings me down. I don't know what to do now, i don't know if i should stay or go. There's just so many factors to think about, and i'm very frustrated. If i manage to decide on one, i would stick to it and stop thinking about the other. And make sure i start doing things right.
Sighhhh.

Through this whole year, i feel like everything was a waste.
What have i gained?

life is being a bitch to me, and 2010 is like a smlj piece of trash.

2010-10-02T11:02:00.003+08:00

Never felt like i wasted so much time before.
I wasted my 8 months in a JC i guess.

What's the point of regretting.
This sounds like my posts 10 months ago, where O lvls ended and I'm getting all worried about my results.
But, this time I'm sure I'm on my way to another year of learning the exact same things again. My papers don't seem to want to save me at the last point when I didn't choose to save myself from the start.

What do I want, I ask myself.

I want to do things I like, not like burying myself in books all day, learning subs I don't like eg: Chemistry.
I would like to do drawings whenever I'm free, stuff that are related with what would be beneficial to what I'm doing on my own accord, and not like studying for the sake of good results.

Then why the hell do I put myself in a JC, doing things I don't like, having a fucked-up attitude towards everything including my CCA which i used to like so much and have respect for in my secondary school and when I come here I heck everything and go join something I don't really have passion for.

I feel so lousy, y'know.

Then now I realise I wasted one fucking year of my time enduring all the shitz and not choosing to work hard and then I have to make a choice whether I want to do this again for another 2 years with no guarantee I would succeed because I'm sure I wouldn't have the energy to be hardworking for 2 years. I don't like studying anyway. Then again, why didn't I go to a poly in the first place?!
In a stupid realistic society like this, how I wish one of my hobbies was studying so I can do it anytime I like and not find it a chore.

I just want to go to a University.
So I have to work for it which I obviously didn't. Wait, I think I did, but it's not enough and too late.
But I just like complaining.

-

If life was easy, I'd have a dick.
Goodbye.

Feels like rain.

2010-09-01T19:00:00.006+08:00

" After feeling like a bitch and thinking how much i shouldn't have showed attitude, i feel guilty. Thus it works like a cycle: moodswing, get annoyed, show annoyance, feel guilty, gets unhappy and back to a square one, moodswing. "

Got this off from Peirong's blog and i thought, this really expresses just what i want to say. Hahaha.
Just as i thought i'm not that annoyed anymore, i get affected cuz of the bad attitude i showed to people and i think about how they felt at that time and stuff. Then, it keeps me in a bad mood. So there.

-

Yesterday was a pretty nice day. Pretty nice would mean fine in other words and well it may be just like any other day for the rest of you but trust me, fine is a rare word in my dictionary recently.

Went back to Holy Innocents' High, lunched with my ex classmates and dinner with my 4 peeps I've known ever since 2006.
They just made my day... light hearted. Like a temporary break from all that's been going through my head all this while.

2010-08-29T19:10:00.004+08:00

To give and not expect any returns.

Not talking about donating to charity or whatsoever.

What if you do your best you could for people, but you don't feel them treating you the same. You know best in your heart they actually matter, but what if you don't in theirs?

-

Just when I thought I could.

I no longer feel the same.
It shouldn't matter, it shouldn't. Because eventually they won't get you anyway. So why give a fuck.

Would you rather live a life for yourself, or live a life for others?

I'm just not strong enough, not independent enough.

-

And i hate this side of myself.

Feverrrr.

2010-07-31T20:01:00.002+08:00

Why must this fever come on the weekend seriously. I don't wanna attend school! And monday's Chem lecture test. How am i supposed to focus and study with my current condition? I feel like a laoahma cuz my whole body's stiff like hell, and then my head is kinda spinning a little.

And try jogging/walking 13km with a fever. Today's WillRun day. Supposed to rest at home, but i don't wanna go for the make up run plus the buffer i ran for last week has been given to a classmate who couldn't run. Plus i wanna experience how today will be like! Okay actually i'm quite proud of myself for doing so, but i'm feeling like shit now. I've been perspiring and ate medicine but my temp's not going down! And my mum doesn't allow me to wash my hair! So i'm smelly like some mothabitch. Yuck.

Today i'm like some queen for awhile. Lydia helped me carry my bag plus held umbrella for me. Wahahaha.

NDP rehearsal nowww I can totally see the fireworks from my house. Love the view. :)

:)

2010-07-21T22:09:00.002+08:00

Today was a good day, ended school at 11am, CCA postponed. What else can I say :)
I shall take today as a make-up for yesterday. I hated yesterday really. Know one of those days you get sensitive about remarks or situations and feel all lousy about yourself? Yeah.

So i'm pretty much happy today. Ran 5km today too! Maybe i shld run tmr, Will Run's coming up, my target's 12km. But i secretly hope i can manage up to 14 or 15km. Then i would feel so accomplished. :)

Got back my math pop test few days ago. 6/8. Like my highest test score so far. Though its not counted in the real thing, its giving me some little motivation to keep that up.
I am beginning to know no shit about econs and chemistry again, and my tuition teacher's having her ass off somewhere overseas enjoying herself. I think im gonna make her puke blood. Thats what she always tells me after marking my tuition work.

2010-07-17T21:51:00.002+08:00

Eateateat. Sleepsleepsleep.

I think these are the two stuff I like to do most now. Pigpigpig.

Currently I've always been feeling hungry. And I mean it. Like i wanna keep on eating and eating. Even when i say i don't wanna eat, actually deep down i really do wanna eat, but since my weight's been on the rise, i know i need to control myself before people and yours truly call me ahbui. From ahlim to ahbui. No freakin way.

Yumz.

Anyways, the highlights of this month would be - Shaokiat's birthday & The Big Groove! Oh and yesterday was Parent's night, a nicer way to name Parent-teacher-meeting. Talk abt that laterzzz.

For Shaokiat's Belated Birthday it was pretty simple - we went to Marina Barrage for a little picnic! The planning was last minute but wellz impt thing's that we enjoyed ourselves :) Oh and my first time baking a cake! Peirong Taiyang and I baked his birthday cake! Omgz you better be grateful ok PngSK. Laoniang nvr bake for my real family before, bake for youuuuu. But I like baking stuff anyways so wasn't much of a prob hahaha. The cake turned out pretty good! I'm lazy to upload the pics but if you're a friend on fb you can see it :)

For TBG, it was awesome omg i swear i was screaming and screaming. Shld I say this was even better than BreakOut? I guess it was!
I regret not losing my image and like go run and hug Ryan Conferido. He was just a human being away from me. The human being = Mavis Ong.
Pls come next year, Quest Crew. :)

-

Back to Ptm. Wasn't that bad, but among all the PTMs I had i think this was pretty much the worst. Like throughout the years, the bad stuff my teachers could say to my parents was that i needa focus more or sometimes i get too chatty. Other than that the rest are like good comments already, i'm serious.

But ystd it was
- I get too chatty sometimes. (What is my mouth for)
- I blank out/ daydream. (You're too boring)
- I sleep in lessons sometimes. (C'mon i'm tired)
- I am veryx5 weak in my Math (Okay, veryx1 is enough thx)
- I need to go seek consultations and try not be shy (like whoever said I was shy you know sometimes i just can't be bothered)
- I seem to enjoy coming to school but sometimes i enjoy myself so much i forget the real reason why i'm coming to school (like whoever said I enjoy coming to school so much. You should see i'm so sad all the time lol)
- I need to buck up ALOT because i am a potential retainee. (nice one)
- I submit my homework late sometimes (at least i'm not one of those who gets chased for)

That's somehow about it. And stuff about my fringe whateverz.

So the positive stuff are:
- I'm smart. (but i'm lazy okay heard that way too many times)
- I'm capable. (who isn't)
- I'm cheerful, so smiley that when you see me you'll feel like smiling. (Okay thx 5 dollars please for seeing my million dollar smile)
- I've been more focused in class after Mid Years, but not enough (define enough)

Ta-da. Okay you can ignore the stuff in the brackets they're bullcrap I'm feeling gl-y just trying to retaliate hahaha.

Thank god my dad FORGOT abt this ptm thingy, so he went karting :) Like Hengified. Seriously.
My mum was so cool about all the comments about me. (Y) I expected her to nag and stuff but she didn't! She could even laugh at the text my friend sent me abt her mum.

Promos in 9-10 weeks time. I need 50 energizers in me to keep me going. Right now i'm still taking it slow i know, but see for this week, i've been attempting my homework during breaks! Not during all the breaks but it's good enough. I'll try and be trying! :)

" I believe Crystal doesn't wanna retain. " HECK YES I DONT WANNA RETAIN BITCHES.

Happy father's day! :D

2010-06-20T00:56:00.002+08:00

I just lost 200k in poker cuz i didn't see the next bugger raising it to that and just conveniently clicked. RAH.

Father's day today! Dad's gonna go karting in the morning... We should have dinner together! Just that my bro's not home, off camping @ NP. I felt bad after i told him the person who organised the camp doesn't have a father.

I can't wear cotton fabric-ed jumpsuits. That's damn sad. Cuz I like jumpsuits. :(
I feel fat today. Hahaha.

1 more week of holidays! I haven't started revision. omggg. ineedtoihaveto. My chances of retaining are like.. serious almost a 100% i guess. Unless you brainwash me and let my brain work in the I-LOVE-STUDYING way.

... Which isn't possible.

go forward now, looking back is no solution.
I almost wanted to ask why I chose a JC, again.

Where the grass is really greener.

2010-06-08T15:21:00.004+08:00

Burp. Nice kimchi ramen I just had.

Changed the songs in my mixpod! I think i'll leave it as it is for like a couple of months or something haha.

Telling myself to try complete all homework by this Sunday. HOPEFULLY. Not very realistic for a person like me but whatever. I'm gonna get my GP done by today. :) And go gym tonight. I went on Sunday and i felt good. I did something pretty ironic yesterday. I chose to buy 4 tubs of ice cream home. When i am deciding to lose abt 2-3 kg this month. Why do i think i won't achieve that in the end. Huang Taiyang maybe i need some of your spirit hahaha. Unless yours is even lower than mine then you can roll off bye.

Told my momma my results, and she trusts me so I should do something about it. The amount of times i went out to enjoy myself has been a little much for a JC student. Almost everyday i've stayed back in school til 7+ 8-ish, supposed to do homework and make it productive were like.. 90% of the time failzxzz. Now I do feel a little bad.
I hope this reminds me from time to time so i won't lose my focus. But, easier said than done. Ah.

-

He tells you when. He tells you why. He tells you wherefore.
What to do and how it's done, and how to be for him.
It's all about control, it's all about control.

Trust your spirit, find your wings.

Haunting me.

2010-06-03T11:11:00.002+08:00

So i got back my math paper. Was as expected, i failed.
Funny thing is I got so used to failing, it doesn't really affect me that much anymore.
However, whenever i think about my promo exams that are about to take place in about.. 5 months time, i do feel sad for myself.

Chem lecture later, i wonder how badly i'd do too.

So i decided to get tuition already. Maybe it would push me a little more to passing the subs.

-

Met up with my peepos ystd and went for karaoke! Actually i didn't really have the mood for that, but it was hot so i rather sing then go cycling at east coast.
It did lift my spirits up a little.. :)

I seriously think my appetite increased. After having noodles at.. i think 5+, i ate another waffle at 7+. I don't know what this means to you, but to me it means gaining weight again.
Probs i really should consider go running with my dad. But i don't wanna have my ass up at 7+ to go jogging. ._.

-

So we'll crawl, till we can walk again.
Then we'll run
until we're strong enough to jump.
Then we'll fly, til there is no wind.
So let's crawl, crawl, crawl
back into love.

2010-05-31T22:13:00.002+08:00

Omy lack of updating my blogggg. I did feel like it abt two weeks ago, but i remembered something made me stop. Ok not important.

Anyways so here's pretty much of a summary what's been going on for the past month:
- Submission of my PI which I stayed up a few of nights for.
- My MYE (screwed it so bad there's holes)
- Watched a few movies: Ip Man2, The Losers, Prince Of Persia.
- Did nothing productive for the whole of last week.
- Went Sentosa, got sunburnt quite badly on my shoulders my skin's peeling now i look like i got some skin disease but whatever i grew tan.
- Made choco chip pancakes over at Kimchi's house + watched a movie til i fell asleep cuz bed was too comfortable.
- Movie + shopped a little on Friday.
- Went bowling on Sat.

That's.. kinda about it.

-

I'm not used to this i don't like this i am getting sick of this.
I don't like the fact that I have to tolerate such irritable mofo-ing shit.
I'm just really getting SICK of this i might just lose my fucking temper someday.

Off dayyyy + Long weekend.

2010-04-26T15:50:00.003+08:00

No school today due to the good results SRJC obtained for PW! :]
Supposed to kinda somehow complete most homework by today, but i'm not yet near halfway.

Friday - College Day.

On bus with Yim & others to Compass point.

Math lecture that day lasted for like what, 45 minutes to 50 minutes? Went to Compass Point hoping to have Swensens for lunch but queue was longggg.

So we headed to the food court instead (lol).

Went for a game of bowling before college day rehearsal performance. My score was bad i didn't even hit 100 can you imagine how bad is thattt.

Caught Bounty Hunter @ The Cathay with these peeps! The show was not baddd. Jennifer Aniston is hot.

My first time trying Fried Mars Bars. The first bite was awesome i tell you. But the last two pieces were too sweet for me.

So that's my college day for you. :D

Kinda well day spent i think. But it didn't feel like a friday at allll.

Saturday.

Met up with my ent Mav after breakfast with mah parents @ Compass point (again).

I wasn't in the study mood totally. I kept doodling, using my highlighter to colour some shit. At least i did read up on like.. 1/10 of Atomic structure, lollll.

Sunday.

Spent my time on the com + watching teeveee. Totally not what I had planned. Ughh. But accomplished something I wanted to do though, i went jogging. Haha.

Today feels like one of those days where O lvl has ended and we have got nothing to do, and for some they wish to go back to school.

I don't think I was ever excited for my JC life to start. All i wanted was to rewind the times I had in HIHS.

I miss having the people by my side who I can comfortably tell my troubles and stuff to. Without thinking twice. And i can squeeze them to vent my frustration. I can pinch them as i like when they gl me.

Not as if I can't here, I just don't want to.

It doesn't feel right.

TGIF.

2010-04-16T22:33:00.003+08:00

These two weeks have been bad bad weeks.

3 teachers have spoken to me and 1 called up my mum. Tell me how screwed up I am. It's pretty demoralising. I feel stupid, i feel helpless. I constantly ask myself wtf am i doing here in a JC. To get to a U? And then i think i wouldn't care about that if i could do smth i like in poly then come out to work. Cos i'm doing something I like anyway! Who cares about Chemistry or Math?!!

However Fridays are always cheering me up a little. Haha.

Mid years in about a month. I gotta start revising NOW.

Okay. I just realised this is worse than O's pls. I started revising O's like only 1 or 2 weeks before lah. Some subs were even the day before exam.

Sigh this is draining. Despite this i gained 2 kg. Like wtf i'm meaty enough STOP.

2010-03-21T23:50:00.002+08:00

School tmrwww!
Nah not looking forward to it at all.
Instead I'm still stuck in the "How I wish it was *insert time*" thought.

I'm supposed to be catching up on what i'm struggling with this week! But nothing's done oh well couldn't care less ahzzz.

Goodnight world.

2010-03-18T13:46:00.002+08:00

I swear JH has the best mofo-ing crib everrr! Okay lah among all of my friends.

His house has this audio system that's like all around the house, means whatever he plays in his room, he can make it sound all over the house. I told him it would be v good for parties. Hahaha.

His house has classy toilets.
His house has soo many DVD movies we can watch for over a year without stopping (ok i'm exaggerating you can tell)
His house has a LIFT. HAHAHA. I've seen it before but i've like never been in a house with a lift! Walau 3 storeys only need lift for what! But whatever. :):):)

So JH, Vivian and I were watching movies with the projector that like shines on a big portion of the wall so it's huge.
At first we watched Vancacy 2. From the start I thought it was a stupid show, so we changed to Taken instead. Was not bad! After that was The Hangover HAHAH. Omg a pretty sick show but yeah amusing.

And after I came back home ystd, I did not do my homework!
I need to start now ok byeeee.

It's a girls' thing.

2010-03-17T12:42:00.002+08:00

Hihihiiiii.
I need to enjoy this one week of hols I guess. Cos after this, it's another 3 months of studying+revising+homework, before i get another real break.

Went to catch Breakout on Sunday and i could say i was pretty happy that day! It was pretty awesome but I felt there could be more dancing instead of acting. ntil late at night dunno why i suddenly felt empty. Wth.

And it's lectures on Monday and yesterday. Went for Pool and Mahjong @ Yiwen's house ystd! I was wondering when was my last time at her house. Did I even go to her house last year at all?! Yes, CNY. Then after that time, I kinda don't rmb already...

And for today, I'm gng to JH's house to watch some thriller movies according to Vivien.
Tell me when I should start doing my homework. Tonight? Ok.

I need a wake up call.

2010-03-12T22:20:00.002+08:00

Basically, this whole week was pretty much of a slack week for me. Especially on days like ystd and today. Chem lecture, day dreaming. Math lecture, doodling. Econs lecture was test and i'm gna 100% fail it. Math tutorial, copying from the whiteboard w/o understanding. Chem tutorial, also not listening. GP, sleeping.

And i wasn't giving a damn about homework ystd. And luckily, econs + GP didn't require us to hand in anything today. I thought my econs tchr Jan Teo was better today. My GP tchr sucks. He has severe male PMS or rather some weird attitude problem. Mavis he's not a cute panda ok!

I wasted 7 hours away today. Ended schl at 12.30, end i stayed in schl til like 7+ doing nothing productive. I talked a lot though. Hahaha. And slept for a little while. I am so frickin tired lately. Must be the work of my upcoming female thingy.

I need to change my "come SRJC sure lose weight" view. Cos during breaks, I'm like eating fruit tart or some chicken pie, curry puff etc etc. And in order to keep myself awake, sometimes I buy sweets, choc bar and all that sort to munch on during lectures/tutorials.

Okay lah I seriously need to buck up! Mid year's like abt 9 weeks away. AND IT PLAYS AN IMPT ROLE IN MY PROMOS. At the rate i'm going, i won't be surprised to see 5 Us.

Playing With Fire.

2010-03-05T00:24:00.003+08:00

Relatively a happy day :> though i know i'm gna flunk my first math and chem test, and i feel bad to myself saying this but seriously, who cares. I don't mind going for compulsory math consultation seeing the state my H2 Math's in..

I guess some things take time eh? I'm getting used to my class already and should I say I'm beginning to like my class? Like finally. Though again there are still individuals who're muggers I can't really stand, majority of them to me now seem pretty good. :]

I'm taking part in Captain's Ball and Dragonboat for SR olympics haha! Can't wait for Dragonboating man! 16 people rowinggg. It's gna be at Kallang woooo.

-

Bloody hell my running shoes spoilt today. But whatever it's been with me for abt 5 years. Time to get a new one! Bloodyhellx2 New Balance came ystd and Feldman could help me get a discount EASILY. Why didn't I buy.. eh nono. Why my shoes spoil today?!

-

Go Shawty, it's your birthday.
We gon' party like it's your birthday.
We gon' sip Barcadi like it's your birthday.
And you know we don't give a fuck it's not your birthday!

2010-02-26T23:20:00.002+08:00

Friday is here again! Time passes sooo fast. I think cuz I spent like too much time in school.

Did math in school today til i almost vomitted. I did ONLY 2 questions for god's sake. And i feel like vomitting already. Heng Belinda and Billy were there if not I wouldn't even try to attempt it. Why didn't I stick to what I said when i was in sec 4 man. I told my then tuition teacher: After sec 4, I don't want to have anything to do with Maths!
I know in Poly you have to kinda take A math or smth like that but at least it's easier! This bloody H2 Math leaves me confused everytime and on Wed's lecture my friend and i were like doodling on each other's books. Lol.

I really dislike my econs tutor man. Her voice is irritating and when i am irritated enough i feel like boxing her. And I sueysuey kena the group leader and she just practically throws more work to us, assuming we should be better cos we're the grp leaders. I'm always feeling cranky during her tutorial period.

Die alrd lah I'm struggling with all my H2 subs!
Okay. Actually I don't feel like caring at this moment.

Looking forward to Sunday. ^^

2010-02-20T23:09:00.003+08:00

OK. Forget abt that last emo nemo post.

BUT STILL, WHENEVER I THINK OF SCHL, the shit gets to me again.

Okay it's not the schl, but the class i'm in. It's a bit too stressful for me lah. Every single day, I'm like telling my friends the same thing - I don't like it here. The people in my class are fine, nobody i feel like giving a punch on the face or any sort but it's just... more than half of the class are so hardworking to the extent it's making me frustrated! I'm supposed to feel motivated i dunno abt that but i'm saying i'm not. I know it's not their fault that they're trying to do their best and get everything right but... ahh.
And you can see it's getting competitive here and there, i don't see any class spirit and this is totally ZZZ for me as well. Like, come on. When I hear about how the classes my friends are in are so happening, i totally wish to be there and not here.

I don't want my first year to be so mundane, please. I already dread coming to school. I know i don't have a choice i gotta get used to this. I want RJBFZKWPSDJH. It's like we can click well pretty instantly actually. Previous days some of us met to do homework tgt, and we can talk cock suan each other laugh and yet give each other a reminder that hey we needa study! And we do but of course half the time we are talking, HAHA. But shouldn't it be this way instead of 100% pure studying without any other distractions? Talking and laughing are like great ways to destress!

Sigh, guess no one can have the best of both worlds.

Anyways, my friend Belinda sent this text on Thursday after i kinda told her how i wasn't coping well. It did get to me, and made me pretty emotional.

" Hey it's you who will make a difference.. no matter how bad a situation is, remember this: 'When you feel like giving up, remember why you held it for so long in the first place.' "

Buck up, i gotta buck up. The time will not wait for me to be ready.

Teach me how.

2010-02-17T23:12:00.002+08:00

Can somebody teach me how to appreciate and embrace the situation i'm in right now?

That is, if somebody knows how to. I'd try my very best to learn.

-

i think everything's coming too soon, I'm even stressed over my cca choices and if i shld continue taking chinese or not. my mum was saying it's no big deal, why am i feeling so sian over this. But no, she doesn't get the full picture..

-

I heard, it's supposed to be a good year for those born in in the year of the chicken. I'm not a very superstitious person but in any case, fuck that.
I know it's only been two and a half months but it has alrd been pretty shitty for me.

Who has strong shoulders.

2010-02-10T21:50:00.002+08:00

I've got to have my study vibe on asap.
I'm totally not used to how it works here in SRJC, and the frickin hardworking ppl. They scare me. The thought of involving myself with studies and reading lecture notes everyday is like stabbing a fruit knife into my thigh. Weird description but it is that pain to think about.

I know sometimes it won't be so jialat but i think it's essential if i want to be on track. Right now i'm not, cos i was totally daydreaming during lecture for Math and for Chem, i don't really understand anything.

I think I'd be in a much more happy state if the ppl in D8 were to be my classmates. We would kick butt. And i wouldn't feel so tired during lectures i guess.

-

Anyway, random stuff. Today we had this fire drill thing going on, and after we gathered at the field, did what we're supposed to do, we had a mass dance LOL. Our principal damn (Y), stand at the sports gallery there with others dancing also. Hahaha.

-

I hope Friday comes in just a snap. :)

PEGASUS FTW :D

2010-02-05T21:57:00.002+08:00

I think I overworked my thigh muscles. I had a little difficulty walking properly when i just got up of bed this morning lahhh.

Anyway, Pegasus won for orientation this year wooo. Oh did I mention I'm not in Draco anymore since we split into our CGs? I'm in Pegasus!
Ystd was a blast man everybody was enthu! Big thank you to 1S26's OSLs Jason Jeevitha and Elaine (ok weird they'll not be seeing this anyway but whatever hahaha) Esp the picnic and we played captain's ball and had house cheers + Mass dance.

I think I'd like to be a OSL! One of my dare was to go to this random Draco grp in the netball court and shout Draco oiiii. They were in the midst of their game somemore! I thought nobody would answer and i'd walk away feeling like a retard with those Draco OSLs looking at me with the eye. But in the end the people responded oiii back to me i damn satisfied and walked back to my CG laughing hahhaa. And another time was on the stage with Feldman, Hillary and JunHong and after F and H finished singing the song we shouted Pegasus oi x2 + Pegasus Pegasus + Pegasus Ride On, wah the response we got made me damn shuang. Hahaha ok i'm starting to sound like a weirdo. But seriously, I think I like such events.

I'm now worrying if the group of girls would upload the pic on fb I ruined for them cos I jumped in halfway infront of the cam when one of them snapped. It was a dare I'm not so crazy to randomly do that.

-

Went for dinner with my OG mates after that. Daniel was totally the spasm kid ystd. Kept on laughing siallll. Anyway we all were so high we were cheering on the way to Kovan LOL. Totally reminded me of my sec1 cross country run. Pr Phoebe Fion and I were singing we are the champs and some dirty fruit song my bro taught me the other time while running at MacRitchie.

After dinner we saw some SRJC-ians we didn't know and randomly we were asking who from Pegasus or other groups and we would be like WHOOO PEGASUS. Too high alrd seriously.

-

Today was kinda the start of school. Boring talks in the morning and later on there was this GP test. Not really a test i heard they just wanna know your language skills and stuff. Damn the lecture hall's cold.

Went back to HIHS with Mavis my ent after lunch. We went to see dance and I MISS HIHS SO MUCH I MISS DANCING SO MUCH. We learnt two eights of TikTok though.. After that we sat around in the canteen, I was feeling sentimental. Like we used to sit around in the canteen after dance, perspiring and sticky all over eating instant noodles with sausages.. We go back next time when we're free kay Mav!

2010-02-03T22:36:00.003+08:00

I'm soooo tired. Bball trial was damn tough mannnz! But their team spirit v v good, i like. I heard they always end abt 7+ to 8pm. Damn.
Touch Rugby was pretty ok i think they were going pretty easy on us.

Now we're with our CGs, I don't really like it here. Everybody's kinda like talking among themselves.. they aren't that hyper, so when you high, you gonna look like a freaking weirdo. D8's been the best grp so far. I have to admit this is one grp that I opened up to the quickest.

Went for some amazing race today and had lunch @ HougangMall macs. I seriously felt like crying at tht time. i really really miss being in HI. Furthermore HI is just five minutes away from meeee you get me? :(

-

After tmrw it's time to be serious and get down to work. JC life sounds tough.. Must be committed to studies + CCA, no more time for games or such..
Now I'm kinda stressed abt which CCA to join. It's like i kinda wanna give modern dance a shot ( contem ballet in SR btw ), but i know i don't even have the bloody basics. Same goes to bball. And i'd like volleyball too but i didn't go for the trials. And i want a slack cca but not one i wouldn't enjoy. SEE THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING.

:(:(:(:(:(

MAYBE I SHOULD HAVE JUST PUT POLY AS MY FIRST CHOICE. ARGHHHGHHGHGH.

2010-01-29T23:14:00.002+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HUANG TAIYANG!

Hope you've enjoyed yourself today though we only had a simple celebration for you :) And don't xian the zhaocaimao lao tu lah! Peirong de yi fan xin HAHA. I miss you guys so much and not forgetting my other friends in Holy Innocents'! I wonder when we'll all meet again. I really really miss you guys.

-

Second day of orientation today! I'm beginning to like the schl more, esp my OG Draco8! Most ppl there are friendly and we can click. It's gna suck a little cuz we're gonna have to split after our subject combis are out.. and eventually we might not be in Draco but some other houses instead. I like the name Draco anyways, have the seh. Hahah.

Was chosen for the Student Council thingy but I kinda eliminated myself right away after the talk. I don't want to be kept busy with meetings and discussions. Though there are factors of fun in it i agree... but i'm not a person who can handle stress well. So there goes.

Went to see the Modern dance over there today. Wow. I really don't have ballet bones in my body. I feel weird all over again like the first time I went for the auditions for dance in HI, but I can feel it's a little different.. I lack the confidence. Still pondering over which CCA to go into, but there's still abt a week's time so i'll think about it. Netball, volleyball, basketball(lol), Touch rugby, rock climbing, YOGA?!

I don't know if i want a less tense CCA which is pretty slack or something i'd enjoy doing more but requires commitment. Anyway I heard that CCA's not really impt in JC.. so yah.

Right now everything's going fine... But once i start thinking about the start of studying, cca and exams, i can't help but be scared. 2 years isn't long, but when i think about every single month and how it's gonna pass, it feels long. In short, i'm just really not ready to face such challenges.

SRJC.

2010-01-28T23:09:00.003+08:00

I felt the first day of schl was good. People in my grp weren't those reserved and shy type, so we could interact pretty well :)
Saw a handful of HI peeps there, definitely made me feel better.
The atmosphere there is good, everybody seems pretty bonded.
My specs frame broke again like wth. Third time in 2 months. Cuz today we played the Do You Love Your Neighbour game so i had to get up and run and knocked onto this guy on my head and i fell and there goes my specs.

-

I'm feeling pretty lost right now. I hope i can figure things out soon enough by myself. I miss HI a lot. I am so used the sheltered life in HI, and now we're supposed to choose our subject combinations, i'm rlly at a loss. However i've submitted my choices already. come what may. I'm just still thinking if JC's the right route for me. study & study. And it's going to be hard work. I know it's for about 22 months, but i'm really not into studying. I wonder how long it'll take to sink into my head that i really have to do this. Or maybe never. By then, probs i'll waste one fucking year of my life in JC and then decide to go to a poly. What do I really want? They encouraged us to go find out more stuff and have an idea which course we want to take in U. I feel stressed whenever I think of that, because i totally have no direction where i want to be at all. i feel i have no goal, and that sucks. Going with the flow is good at times, but i gotta have my own place where i want to be, yet i don't have that. And it's not that i don't want to have that, i just haven't found my goal. you know how sucky that makes me feel. I hate feeling this empty.

Schl tmrw!

2010-01-27T22:08:00.003+08:00

I'm admitted to Serangoon JC. Well pretty much expected since NY is 10 points and after deducting, i'd get 10 points too.

I'm feeling kinda lost actually! Like.. really.
No i'm not feeling excited at all. I'm just taking it as it comes, know what I mean? I hope I don't give a stuck up attitude tmrw cos i am totally feeling that way now. Haha.

I've seen the CCAs they offered there. People have told me not to join sports or performing arts, but that's what i like to do baybeh!
I may not join Modern dance cuz I heard their dance is Contemporary ballet like whatttt I have never ever done that and I am not flexible at all I can't even do a fucking split! + I'm definitely more interested in HipHop. I suit Hiphop better too don't I? :)

Saw the guitar ensemble, Pilates, netball and basketball haha! I wonder if they accept girls for basketball cuz I might just join bball! But I'm afraid i'm gna be the only noob there cuz there are def people who have it as their ccas previously or enjoy it as a sport... So yeah. And i'm gonna be a 159cm basketball girl then! Hahaha! I hope I grow taller like... 3 cm, it's enough :):)

-

Okay. I just spent away my 90 bucks I've earned when helping Taiyang's mum out at her cafe. I shld have taken a picture of the signboard! Has Taiyang's big name on it hahaha!

Anyway will be receiving another 40 from TY on Friday. You better gimme or else the strawberry cake's gonna be on your face not in your mouth. :)

-

Wearing HI's uniform again tmrw... Feeling a little... should i say nostalgic?
Ups & Downs, experienced it all in HI. There's definitely more to come and no, I'm not ready.

Ok, i gotta stop typing more. I'm getting emotional and I'm remembering events from sec1 already.

I just wanna live.

2010-01-22T23:07:00.003+08:00

I am physically tired.
I sense a slight body ache coming up tmr!

Have been standing for almost 7 hours straight today. I can like remember the price of almost everything now haha! But when i'm pretty busy i tend to ask the uncle who makes the tea and coffee how much is everything. The uncle's not v friendly though. Quiet guy. Everyone else there is pretty friendly. I liked that it rained today. Other than the cool winds, it suited my mood as well. I was feeling light and calm until i went to Novena 2 to buy eggs, aloe vera and celery back.

Know how heavy 120 eggs is or not! It definitely was heavier than I thought. But not as if I was like struggling or wobbling all over, but it was heavy! From fourth floor, anyway, WHY THE FAIRPRICE HAS TO BE AT FOURTH FLOOR, take down to level one, walk thru the underground pass blabla okay i make it sound damn far but it feels far you come try. Somemore the aloe vera's side has little sharp edges it kept pricking meeeeeee.

So i braved through ______ ( actually not really anything la just curious looks lol ) and finally reached my destination which is Huang TaiYang cafe and i placed the stuff down looking for tissue to wipe off my beads of perspiration and i was asked to go buy carrots. ._. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry... seriously. And i really didn't want to perspire today cos it was raining!

Okay it may sound like nothing to some people and yet i'm over here whining about it but i'm not used to running such errands. End of story.

Thankfully for the plastic glove i didn't get a deep cut. I saw Angie's hand with like two plasters two days ago lol.

-

Just had teppanyaki for dinner @ Sakae Sushi. Doesn't taste as good as the teppanyaki at GoodwoodPark man. The Chef @ Goodwood was friendly too and he was neat. But still! I like eating and watching at the same time mmmm.

My mum a bit funny today. She asked me to call my bro dua lan pa when i told her my bro called me dua ka chng. LOL.

-

My dad bought a new car! The Volkswagen Jetta. It can go on cruise though it's not a luxury car. Cool. Howeva, I've been getting car-sickness like three out of three times I sat in the car so far. I don't know if its cos it's a new car or if its just me.

-

It's just emotions taking me over.

2010-01-21T17:59:00.002+08:00

Refreshed!

I smelt like dead fish and my hands smelt of celery after blending it.

I don't like the blender cuz it requires us to wash it like after 6 or 7 blends.. and all the remaining stuff that doesn't blend to liquid stucks at the side it's pretty gross but knowing they're fruits its still ok. Oh gross thing today I stepped on a frickin cockroach and it produced the 'crunch' sound. Ok back to what i was saying. I think I washed that blender for like... i think more than 5 times today? And wash cups wash the towels squeeze them dry, my hand is wearing outtt. My index finger de blingbling drop alrd. :(

Let's see.. My fav thing to do there shld be spreading Kaya on the bread. But not many people want toast though.. I think only 4 had them today. I don't really like blending fruits cos i have to slice the fruits into smaller pieces idk i feel i take damn long. So, i shall slice watermelons papayas and carrots before hand tmrw. Most people want that.

-

Didn't you do the same?

2010-01-18T23:42:00.003+08:00

I just went for soft rebonding ystd! And i look friggin weird. I don't look like me. Not it's not cuz i'm not used to it, this hairstyle isn't me.

But after 1 week or so when my new hair grows out, maybe it won't be soo flat.
The good thing is, I don't even have to comb my hair! And how much i shake my head it would kinda fall back into place. :):)

-

I'm going to help Taiyang out at her Mum's coffee shop. And the name's "Huang TaiYang's Cafe" LMAOOOOO.

I was like literally laughing after the reply i got from her.

I gotta trim my nails. And remove this glittery dark purple colour! I feel like painting my nails gray hahaha.

-

Kay so i wasn't accepted for the Universal Studios job cuz I told them I may enter a JC. :(
Anyways, after hearing what Marcus said, i started thinking if putting jc as my first few choices was the right thing to do. I know i don't enjoy studying. I'm studying for the sake of passing the exams, or rather hoping to do well for the exams, having a better future and stuff. i don't really like it that it has to be this way. I rather spend time drawing and doodling, watching people cook or design spaces than read and memorize. Sighhh but what's the point of thinking now. I've made the damn choice and i just have to push myself.

If i go to a jc, which is highly possible, i'm so not ready to start school yet.

I wouldn't mind if Ngee Ann poly takes me into Mass communication seriously!

2010-01-15T13:06:00.003+08:00

Posted my choices online alrd...

I'm not gonna think too much. Where ever I go, just do my best, that's what its all about. Cuz at the end of the day, you're the one that matters.

Gng for a job interview tmr! Marcus helped me with it so yeaaa :]
Like FINALLY getting to earn money. So what if schl's reopening in 2 weeks if i go JC. But for attending dance classes, I'm afraid it won't happen now...

Good luck to all getting into your choice of the choices. :D

2010-01-12T18:17:00.003+08:00

Feels good to be home. :>

-

Yesterday was the release of our O lvl results!
Omg my results were like beyond what i had expected. I even told me mum two days before that my r5 cfm higher than 15. BUT I GOT 14. MWAHAHA. Really satisfied. :D:3:D Grats to all my friends who did well too!

Was really anxious before that, and asked Mr. Anba how we scored, he told us not to worry and I kinda didn't believe him. After screaming and laughing and kissing Peirong I went to ask Mr Anba for a hug HAHA. He said he was proud of me omgz the feeling is shuangology lor!
I really did make improvement! For Prelims my r5 was like 29?!

I said that last minute revision doesn't work 75% of the time for me. However, the remaining 25% chance worked for me after all during O's. :>>>

Why did i worry so much about my results man... though i admit the joy's pretty much worth it but it's been like affecting my mood, like i can't enjoy myself to the fullest cos this thing has been bugging moi.

Anyways, my dad allowed me to stay over at the resort! :D

Mr Anba came awhile for the bbq... and after that we started drinking, Caslin got mad high, after awhile GuoHui was a little wasted too. Mavis was just behaving like someone who just came out from woodbridge.

Josh & Marcus went to mix Rose syrup + Milk + a little Vodka. I asked them to add peanut butter and after that added this packet of coffee powder mixture LOL.
We brought the jug in the room and played zhong ji mi ma and later on the person with two cards' value added up was the least, he/she has to drink that mixture. After awhile Marcus and Josh went to add two raw eggs inside omg. But the taste isn't that gross after all. I liked the peanut butter inside hahaha.
I felt that Vodka + Chrysenthemum tea was worseee. Gross shiate man.

At abt 2 am plus, after playing a little Mahjong, went to walkwalk by the seaside.
Damn breezy! A little cold but me like. Haha Mavis and Josh gotta do this forfeit:

Mavis walks to Aloha Loyang Resort's Guardhouse at the entrance.
Mavis: Excuse me, may I know where is Aloha Loyang Resort?
Guard: It's here.
Josh: *pretends to pass by* Oh, i know where Aloha Loyang is. It's there *Points to another direction and directs Mavis away*
Guard: No, it's here! It's here!

Hahahah damn dumb sial!

Sorry I woke those in room 2 up with my laughter hahah but JiaHui's head popping out on top of me and prong really cracked me up! Anyway I barely had 2 hours of sleep! So I'm gonna sleep early tonight!

Anyway, three more days to decide on where I wanna goooo. I'm pretty stuck right now. Who's in the same position as me? :(

-

I want to find back the happy happy me.

2010-01-09T22:54:00.002+08:00

This Oil my mum bought smells so weird! I thought it smelt a little like insecticide at first.
Okay it's now applied on my hair! And it really does smell weird ewk.

Gna trim my hair tmr and i think a few days l8r for soft rebonding ahhaha! I painted my nails dark purple again mwahhaha.

-

This whole week was a bore, except for Monday. Hahaha.
Avatar's pretty good I think.
When we asked Mr Anba how it was when we saw him in schl he was like, " Hmm.. The effects are pretty good. "
Haha, indirect way of saying he doesn't really like it.

-

O lvl results coming out on 11th! Worried I am, but i guess i'm pretty much prepared on receiving unsatisfactory results though..
But still, i think i would freak out on Monday.
4sin BBQ on Monday too.. I wonder if we would be rejoicing or like downing ourselves with alcohol due to sorrow (not so dramatic la). Hahaha.

-

I want to be happy.

Happy 2010!

2010-01-01T00:12:00.002+08:00

Happy New Year people!

Just finished lookin at the fireworks through the window. :]

Hasn't really hit me that 2009 is really gone.. Probs cos we don't have schl right after this weekend. 2009's been pretty much of a ride for me. Kinda saw what my weakest points and strongest points are.. Gotten me down for quite a bit so i need to learn how to improve!

I really wonder what 2010 has in store for me. I mean i know in the end it's all up to an individual to make it happen.. but yeah, i wonder.
Big changes about to take place. Can't say i'm ready for it yet.. Still taking it slow. Haha.

When is our results coming out seriously?! I've heard 9th, 12th, 15th, 18th.. Ah.
If it's 9th.. it's coming in a week! But it's a saturday.. lol. However if it is! It's coming in a week! GAH. But actually I'll prefer this. Like get my results, rejoice/cry and get over it. Now i'm like this wreck, freaking out a little everyday when i'm thinking of it. Sometimes, i really freak out and feel so helpless cuz nothing can be done to change anything huh.

My biceps are achinggg! I think it'll get worse tmr. Went to Sherman's gym ystd and today. I'm feeling fat! Esp my thighs, disgusting things.

Gng to catch Avatar tmr! In 3DDDDDD. :D:D:D

2009-12-27T23:13:00.002+08:00

Bad dream last night... I dreamt I got 14 for L1B4 and 23 for L1R5.
That means I only passed 5 subs. And failed the rest. And got f9 for those I failed!

That is bad.. like really bad...

-

I've somehow came to a conclusion why I'm feeling so scared and all. Cos I know clearly how much effort I've put in and stuff. And I know it's not enough for me to score well.

I did last minute revision. Like how i always do and i know 75 percent of the time it doesn't really work well. And now we're talking about O lvls, and this year those subs which requires memorizing are like put together! I didn't perform my best. My best isn't this lousy. I don't know why i couldn't complete my e math.. I don't know why i couldn't think when writing my eng compo.

All i can say is, i hope i get at least a decent, acceptable score. Definitely not the L1R5 in my dream, please.

Merry X'mas to all!

2009-12-25T01:58:00.002+08:00

Ahhz I should have just went out with my brother when he said he wanna get some ciggs. Now he's tired already and lazy and went to sleep.

I'm bored! And it's in the A.M now what can I do. I can sneak out but it's weird asking ppl: Hey wanna come out now? -.-

Anyways! Went out juz now to kinda celebrate Christmas.
We like walked about for almost an hour before deciding on what to eat... So we went to Manhattan fish market in the end. We = TY PR SK HM AND MUA.

Fish was pretty alright, I got sick of it after eating half... It's like creamy pasta get it.

Supposed to bowl but it's full. And there was a small show going on. This family of angmohs were like arguing with the people working there. "It's cheat it's cheat." " I don't know how am i supposed to know?" "I'll call a lawyer for a lawsuit we'll see who will win." Something like that.

That guy sucked pretty much he just put the list on the table without looking at me or saying a word. And when I asked him when can we roughly get the lane he was like, i'll call you. That's not even answering my question. -.-

So went for pool + arcade(lol) I didn't get to play my BishiBashi!

My mum seems to be quite in a good mood I guess. She didn't know I notified my dad I'll be home after 11 after telling both of them earlier today i'd be home before 11 and called only at 11.25. Her usual self would call at like probs 11/11.05 cos I said I'd be home before 11.
So just told her gimme 15 more mins and told her was at Bishan and she's like mm ok.
Haha.

Now I got this small red thing on my upper arm I have no clue wtf it is.

I'm kinda freaking out for the o lvl results right now.. AH.

'Cuz I Can.

2009-12-19T23:42:00.003+08:00

I guess I'm going to be right. We'll see what happens. Maybe I have acted/am acting like how I wouldn't want myself to be.. and if it's true, it's worth reflecting about. And it tells we're just all alike. Which again, confirms another.

It's like 1+1=2.

Aiyah.

I feel like acting like a spoilt brat right now. Have everything go my way and still be unsatisfied. However. That's not reality.

How can i want to behave like someone who i will not accept behaving like that.

I need more peace in my mind, I think.
I need to learn how to appreciate more and pick on less.
I need to learn how to understand and accept and be more gracious.
I need to learn how to behave like an angel.

Okay, fuck that last sentence. Bye.

Starstrukk.

2009-12-17T23:47:00.002+08:00

Whee got back my iPod touch from JiaHui! Thanks JiaHui for helping me with it :D

I haven't found a bloody job!
I feel I'm wasting these days away... Nonono cannot.

Now my brother moved the whole wireless Linksys thingy to his room and the bloody signal is VERY LOW so it disconnects often and it's pissing me off lahhh.

I just got my framless specs fixed cos the side broke. And over there I tried on the ones with black frames. Not bad at all I may get it :]

Hahahha mummy showed me the coloured contact lenses on the newspaper and said we'll check it out someday at Hougang Mall. I wonder why my dad minds me wearing on contact lenses so much..

Anyways should I go for soft rebonding?!

Nice black shoes :]

2009-12-13T22:38:00.002+08:00

Went shopping todayyyy ahhhhhh! :D

I really like my new black heelsss. Though they may kill my feet..
Didn't buy as much stuff as I thought I would. I still need another pair of shoe, some more clothes, bigger clutches and more linglinglonglongs for my wrists hahahah.

I hope there really is the training this Friday! Then there'll be work+dance in my life which would definitely improve the state my no life life's in. And I'll feel so independent cuz i'm gna pay my dance fees on mahhh own hahaha! :) when I think of it. :):) when i buy my stuff too i won't have to use a single cent of my allowance ahah! Okay i'm drifting pretty far but yeh it does make me excited.

-

I feel something's missing already.. Though it hasn't happened but i feel it. I just do not wish for it to be true. No i'm not thinking too much cuz nobody can be 100% sure of anything.

2009-12-11T23:26:00.002+08:00

After washing my hair twice, my hair still has that slight scent of bbq.
Ewkkk man. Or has the smell invaded my sense of smell so everything i smell smells like bbq? Nah I don't think so my hands smells like soap :D

Okayyy. So New Moon was pretty blah.. I personally prefer Twilight.
In short, new moon was
blablablablabla jacob'shotbod blablablabla Bella desperate to see Edward blablablabla jacob'shotbodagain blablablablabla Edwardbohdaijichuehdaiji blablablabla Bellachoseyouknowwhointheend.

It's like pretty much what you see on the trailer.. Really. Kinda expected so.. yah. New moon's not good for me.

Well if I had to choose team Jacob or Team Edward, Team Jacob lahhh although i know Bella's with the white sparkling guy in the end but whateverssss!

Today's buffet wasn't very successful. My eyes were feeling tired I was tired I felt like whining and whining and stuff like that know what I mean? Yeah didn't eat a lot though I did feel full.

And yayyy did what I wanted, we went to take neoprints and thanks shaokiat i know i can act cute. :)
Wah the position of my legs sibeh ugly lor I had to waste time on trying to cover it up and kept pressing wrongly so in the end I didn't really decorate anything sorry Prong!

Anyways redeemed something from them today. On my birthday they passed me this voucher slip and says it expires on 17dec. So I told them I want to "redeem" it today but I didn't bring the voucher slip. Howevaaaa that is nothing major because I know it's gonna be in my hands in the end anyway! I like it a lot! Thanks guys! (though DaMao did most of the stuff huh) :D Love you all to pieces like the jigsaw hahah!

Byeeee. :>

2009-12-09T14:40:00.002+08:00

Monday: Went for the hamper packing interview.. Totally wasn't what I had expected. But pretty understandable. The hamper I packed was pretty horrible. Lol. If they don't call me, I don't think I'll go for their training.. Most probs wait for Taiyang to update me on Pan Pacific.
Headed to Kovan for pool, got me pretty annoyed + had stomach cramps whatevs. Sye Wai and HongYang came over to look for us later on and dinner+dessert and homeee.

Tuesday: Home for first half of the day and went to Kendy's house for her birthday. Happy Birthday you + Liyan. Hope you've enjoyed your day. :)

For today, I'm rotting at home again and going out for dinner l8rrr.
When can I get a f-ing job. I want to earn money and go learn danceee. Sorry Mavis for making you wait!

Going to catch New Moon on Friday but most impt we're having buffet steamboat!
Taiyang thought something's weird w me cos she thought I don't really like steamboat? Since when did I say that? :o I just don't really like having buffets too much cos you gonna have to stuff yourself, which i think once in awhile would be enough. She doesn't think so cuz... Aiyah just look at her size.
We shall go take neoprints again okieee loool!

I wanna watch Zombieland and HuaMulan but Zombieland's M18?
Taiyang thought it's gna be those thriller movie cuz of it's name.. -.-

Just cleared out some of my clothes few days ago.. I wanna go shopping soon! Replenishhh. However there are some that's still in their own shopping bags which I bought maybe like half a year ago? LOL.

I wonder how next year will be like. I don't even have a range for my results now. It's like I pretty much screwed up everything I don't want to think of it but it likes to pop up in my mind and then make me :(
Told Amanda ystd that I don't really enjoy the process of meeting new people and getting to know them..
It's like you say Hi and they say Hi back and then some awkward silence later on and you have to ask them questions to carry on with the conversation. And I really don't like to talk to people who just answers your questions and doesn't ask you anything back.. It leaves you feeling like, Okay man so this person's so quiet what shall i say next or should i not say anything at all and then we shall get on with our lives whee.

But well, you'll get to know new people who some will graduate into friends whom yeah, will be part of your lives for the next decades. So all that's just essential. And by then, I hope I get more freedom so I can go boozing LOL. But if I happen to return home drunk, I'm def gna get some shit.

I'm having the urge to go for soft rebonding and have some maroon-but-more-to-the-red-side highlights and then have a fabulous fabulous edgy short hairstyle.
But I think most of my friends can't imagine all that on moiii. I'm worried I'll look like crap too. My mom was like noooo too but we'll see we'll see. :):)

Bad luck much?

2009-12-05T22:02:00.009+08:00

I wonder what's wrong with the appliances in my house.

First, the fridge spoilt. Then, two days ago, the tv in the bedroom. Yesterday, the living room's speaker and the light in the toilet. It keeps flashing ystd I was pretty creeped out LOL. But today it's alright, not flashing but like dimmer...

I hope this laptop's not going to be down tmr.

Can see the difference in my face colour? In real life I should look redder than the second pic lol.

This is what takes place when I only drink half a bottle of Breezer.

Hahaha brings me back to the chalet we had at the end of the year when we were sec 1. My friends thought I was drunk cos I said I looked like Wang Fei (Faye Wong), the chinese singer. Show you one of her pic you will know what I mean.

Hahaha look at her cheeks!

That's why I said that. And Shaokiat, all along, thought I meant Wang Fei as the Empress/Queen. LOL.

No wonder they thought I was drunk.

And i hope this makes you happy now, that the flame we had is burning out.

And i hope you like your pictures facing down, as even broken hearts may have their doubts. Our chorus came out unrehearsed, and you smiled the whole way through it. I guess maybe that's what's worse.

So take a look at me, see what you want to see when you get home.

Take me home, you have a problem with the truth.

Take me home, because this happens every time.

I knew it would, I knew it would...

We had our time.

2009-12-03T22:12:00.003+08:00

Turn it up for the people that say, we're moving on and we'll be okay.

2009-12-01T20:12:00.004+08:00

I woke up today and the first thing i saw when i opened my eyes was this crawly on the walllll. Can you imagine how freaked out I was! How long has it been in my room, has it crawled on my bed, so I have been sleeping with this crawly in my room the whole night?!
Okay I seriously don't know what kinda crawly is the crawly called. It's like millipede but not, like a centipede but not. It's much smaller but also curls up when disturbed. You normally see them near soil.. I think.

My room's not a garden you crawly crawl on my wall for what!
Okay anyways my dad just caught it and flushed it down the toilet bowl LOL.

-

Sigh. Not very enthusiastic in getting a job now? I don't know.

I really really wanna go learn dancing though. :)

My SYTYCD's showing tonite too yay. :) :)

-

I'm currently searching for the crawly on the internet I just mentioned but.. I don't see it anywhere!
I don't think it falls under the worms category...

-

Oooo anyway I know who's T.O.P now LOL.
Jamie liked him a lot. No wonder, cuz he's pretty cute. Hahahah. I was watching IRIS and this young pretty boy was playing the bad guy and I thought he looked damn familiar, and I told my mum he's from a korean band. Not long after was watching MTV and BigBang's MV was on and I saw him again. Mwaha.

Anyway, main point = T.O.P is cute. :):)

For a long time I haven't felt like " Eh this guy really not bad siaaaa ". Seriously. Hahahha.

My last was Chris Brown if I'm not wrong.. said that he's hot. (def not becos he abused Rihanna ty) Oh Lee Jun Ki too when I watched Time Between Dog and Wolf & Iljimae. *.*

Okay me shall show you him(T.O.P):

So pretty. Hahahaha.

Okay Crystal you gotta stop this.

Today I cooked some Angel's Hair and topped it with some Jap mixture from a packet. I though it was bacon or like carbonara kind cuz the picture looked like it! In the end it turned out to be millions of pink fish eggs.

And it was soooo salty so obviously one packet is not for only for one serving and luckily my brother came back so I made more Angel's hair so at least the whole thing wouldn't be so salty. But after eating I found it so gross bleagh.

Walao I think my uncle go psych my dad again with some stupid theory again lah. Just cos his distant relative's daughter got pregnant at the age of 17 or 18 and knew that guy through playing pool... He came up with this: It is better to have an adult to go along.

Eh hello you want to follow your daughters everywhere that is your business lah okay I know your daughters don't mind cuz you can provide them with money when they run out of it but hello whatever just keep your fucking "adult should go along" theory shut.
I am already deprived of freedom I don't need you to make it worse. My parents are kia-su parents enough alrd. AND AM I YOUR RELATIVE'S DAUGHTER. LIKE AS IF I WILL KNOW A GUY THROUGH PLAYING POOL AND HAVE A BABY WITH HIM?!?!!.

I know my dad was just telling me what my uncle said but it definitely has affected my dad's thinking. All the more my dad's gonna play safe and tell me it's for my own good blablabla. ZZZ x a billion. I mean my dad won't follow me to meet my friends like my uncle.. but point is, i am a girl waiting to break free of stupid chains. I don't know how many times I've been unhappy over the fact that I do not have freedom and how much it has costed on my relationship.

Shall stop ranting. Gon go appreciate talented ang mohs dancing their asses off now. :)

Kryptonite.

2009-11-30T23:23:00.001+08:00

Wheee. I got a playlist. Enjoy the songs. :]
Thanks Peirong for helping!

And now I can download songs whee whee I am no longer deprived of good music.

Bulletproof.
I'll never let you sweep me off my feet,
the messages I've tried to send, my informations just not going in.

I won't let you turn around and tell me now I'm much too proud.
Do your dirty words come out to play when you are hurt?
There's certain things that should be left unsaid.

I won't let you turn around, and tell me now I'm much too proud.
All you do is fill me up with doubt.

This time baby I'll be bulletproof.

2009-11-29T02:05:00.003+08:00

Okay sudden mood change I don't know why. I'm feeling pretty happy and hyped up. LOL.
I mean I do feel tired, I'll sleep soon it's 2.05am!
Eh but who knows after the sleep tmrw I'll wake up feeling like a whiny bitch.
Or go moody..
Or go angry..
Well actually it depends on my thoughts and all.

So I must tell myself I know what is right. What should be right. I shall not allow those stuff happening to me and running through my head to bring me down and get me moody or emo because I don't deserve this, though going through this is inevitable. I won't lie to myself, I know what's reality and what's reasonable.

This is, partly, the work of confidence. I like it I like it.

2009-11-28T23:53:00.002+08:00

CRYSTAL IS PISSED RIGHT NOW CUZ THE FUCKING WINDOWS LIVE IS HAVING PROBLEMS FOR MANY MANY DAYS ALREADY SHE HAS TO USE AN ALTERNATIVE WHICH IS EBUDDY AND IT'S PRETTY COCKED AND SHE JUST TOOK FOREVER TO GET THE CHEEBONG CONNECTION DONE AFTER TRYING GAZILLION TIMES AND CLICKING ON THE MOUSE SO BADLY CRYSTAL NOW FEELS LIKE HURLING THIS LAPTOP TOWARDS THE WALL BUT SHE DOESN'T WANT TO DO A STUPID THING SO SHE DIDN'T.

RAHHHHH.

ftw= fuck the world.

2009-11-26T23:09:00.002+08:00

Hahahah that's what my bro said. And I'm currently in that mood right now.

Supposed to go search for jobs today but in the end we sat in Mos looking at the newspaper and dialled numbers... And walked about AMK hub, went into the arcade and Peirong got two free games! One was the zonking thingy and another was some use gun shoot to produce music and Peirong failed hahahaha. Oh anyway we= Prong Maosheng GuoHui and moiiii.

I don't think I'll like to visit that LAN shop anymore.. 1 hour's 2 dollars. We were there for 2 hours and 8 minutes.. or was it 18 minutes arh forget it anyway. We each had to pay 5 bucks. Like wth.

So conclusion of the day - Job hunting was unsuccessful.

-

Everytime I get reminded of after holidays, I think of my results. And it worries me I can't stop it. I tell myself it's over no point blaming yourself for starting revision late, getting distracted blablabla but seriously, I only have myself to blame. No discipline, no willpower, this is what you get.

-

Probs I shouldn't find reasons or excuses no more. In the end, I may be the one taking in all the shit anyway. Is it worth it if people act like they don't give a damn while you're the one left feeling troubled? I think, no. No, no.

But I should give the benefit of the doubt. However, am I thinking too much?
Why am I experiencing this right now. It bugs me everyday and still I can't come out with a fucking answer. I wanna scream. I want this to be resolved. I am tired. Here. (points to head)

Goodbye.

2009-11-25T13:29:00.003+08:00

I can't sign in the bloody windows live so I gotta go all the way to msn.com and blablabla.
Not very efficient...

Anywayssss. Prom yesterday. Pictures on facebook I guess. All the tagging here and there.
It was alright, seeing everybody dressed up and stuff. How I wish most people do not mind not putting make up because I think I look better without make up lolll.
Probs I should have worn my purple dress eh? My dress was short yesterday and I was having difficulty getting in and out of the car fearing I would zou guang.

Food was pretty average, not really to my liking. I only like the roasted chicken and thank you Zing for giving me that chicken head.

Other than that, photo taking, cheering screaming... And oh ya Mr Anba got pwned by Hweemay (prom queeneh by the way) hahahahaha.

Overall was okay.. I just felt something was missing. I don't know what. I could feel I wasn't like hyped up or truly happy yesterday.. Bah.

Okay enough of the emo-ness. I SHALL GO WATCH MY SYTYCD season 4 whooo :D

2009-11-18T15:32:00.002+08:00

First of all, thanks to everybody who wished me Happy Birthday! :D

Yesterday was a pretty simple day spent but was heartwarming to me.
Thanks prong pig and smelly! :D
Okayyy, so we went K-box at first and I tell you. Don't. Pick. Old. English. Songs.
Okay maybe not olddd but like maybe songs just at least 6 or 7 years back..
Because the music video would be damn crappish. From an ugly Asian lady on a yacht to some stupid scenery on the beach and people skiing... omg.

Note: Do not tell Taiyang much of any plans/surprise because she can guarantee you she's gonna blurt it out. Seriously.

Went to catch this NC-16 movie(lol), Marantau Warrior(?) if I'm not wrong..
Well it isn't too bloody or gory for me, don't be disappointed ah you all three! They were like, woah gory and violence Crystal like, she sadist one sure laugh. -.-

Hahaha in the end I got surprised by the cake when we were having dinner..

THANK YOU GUYS :D lovelove you all!
Thanks to fat shyt fat head for coming to pass me my gift too!

Now, wo shall go chong liang. Byeeee. :]

Band aid not.

2009-11-16T00:25:00.003+08:00

Today my dad blew his top. And I think it's been a long time since I heard so many F words in a minute. Got pretty shocked. Reflected on my attitude and perhaps yeah, we shouldn't be so selfish.

Anyway, had a family gathering at my Granny's house yesterday. Thought I actually get along better with my older cousins than those of my age or younger... I have more stuff to talk about to them and I won't be left feeling "er okay yah ha-ha zzz".

Yesterday was the first time I played L4D and first time I went into a LAN shop too. LOL.
We tried L4D 2 and it was pretty hilarious cos that guy go set mode into expert like totally wthhh.
New weapons included like pans and guitars(LOL).
There's also some thingy that will temporarily make you not bai-ka (cripple) and some puncture thingy that can revive your teammates.
There's this SWAT team look alike zombie who has armour infront but yet I spammed my bullets on him from the front and he won't die he kept attacking me and my bro went to shoot his ass and then he die alrd. -.-
First time playing, so kept on shooting my cousins and brother accidentally hahaha.

Hey L4D 2's coming out on 17th Nov... Care to get me that as a present, anyone? Hahaha!

-

time to work it out?

2009-11-12T22:00:00.002+08:00

O's over O's over.
No use regretting and asking myself why I did not start revision earlier blablabla.

-

I feel so aimless.
Like what am I going to doooo.
I think I'm gonna be working as a waiter. Omg.
But it's okay I think I'll be working 4 times a week for 8 hours each day I guess.
So one week I'll earn like... 192 bucks.
Almost 200.
A week!
Hahahah lemme think what am I gonna do w the monehhh.
- Treat family to dinner.
- Buy what I want.
- Pay for dance classes if I can go learn.
- Save lorrr.

Yeah that's what I'm gonna dooo. Thought of it makes me excited.
Anywayzzz. I GOT MY I TOUCH MY I TOUCH WHEE BUT MY COM'S SHIT SO I APPARENTLY CANNOT PUT ANYTHING INSIDE BUT WHATEVER. AHAHHA.

-

I'm actually not feeling very happy. Stuff bugging me.
I really don't know what to do now. Should I just leave it and see how it goes or just voice out how I am feeling? But I don't want to ruin anything, I really don't wish to. But if I leave it and it continues this way, I see no point anymore.
Thinking about it, that shouldn't be the way. Maybe I'm not cut out for this. I do try my best. I can't say everytime but well, sometimes.
I'm close to being tired of having to think about the hows, ifs, whys, when in the end, I can choose to be really selfish and not think about it.
But I don't want to.
I know I'm stronger than this.

-

I wanted to type G'bye but if you really read it as G alone (jee) it will sound like jee bye (cheebye).
Okay sorry I was just a little too random.

Now really, bye.

tik tok?

2009-11-07T10:23:00.004+08:00

Okay finally after a long long time..
I am here to post :]

I'm left with HCL and the Combined Science mcq.
Then all the sec 4s, WE FREE.

I don't have the feeling of all of us being graduates from Holy Innocents' High..
I guess cos we're still coming back to take O's and stuff. Also there's still prom comin' up. So it isn't the last time seeing everybody eh?

4 years in here are pretty short, but pretty eventful.
I learnt to see the different faces of people.. How ridiculous they can be, how many lies they can fabricate.
But also, nice nice people who I call them friends.

I remember people began to enter and drift away from me at the same time when I was in Sec 3. I first lost Fion and then Shannon. They were the two of the closest ones to me during my first two years in Holy Innocents' High. All of my friends did give me joy and pain.. but that's how it works doesn't it? Somehow I felt I lost them definitely because of what both of us did and how we reacted. Come to think of it, maybe I should have been less harsh or more tolerant.

So far every year here has been an eventful one and I'll definitely remember them. Thanks to all the people who've been there for me, helped me, even if it's only once or a gazillion times, thank you.

-
O O O's.
After Physics paper 2, I really felt very relieved. It's like the whole of last week I've been jamming myself with Math SS History and Art and Science. Time was not enough.
Well there was, I didn't make use of it in the months before.
I hope last minute revision helps.

I really don't know how my grades will be like.
I didn't finish like any piece of paper except for Science and English Paper 2.
And for math, all the bloody carelessness.

But I'd be happy enough if my L1 R5's below below 18. Really really.
But how, I do not think it is possible.
Anyway going to a JC may not be what I want either.. Still thinking about it.

Somehow I feel what I achieve and how my grades are like are not totally going to about me and me only.
It involves my parents, cousins who are the same age as me, their parents, competition, pride and other stuff.

That gives me more pressure and I do not like it. Some people take it as motivation for themselves not to lose out, but for me it doesn't work that way. I know someone among us has to be at the bottom, I have a feeling it's me. However the thought of my Aunt comforting me and saying I can do better makes me wanna slap her because she's a fucking hypocrite. Like as if she cares. All she cares about is to make her babies win me.

Shingz to her.

I'll be getting my i-touch after O's. Woo hoooo~

And for now, write compos do exercises read chem+physics and done yayyyy. :D

Frustrated.

2009-09-24T16:12:00.002+08:00

Finally blogging again. I wonder who visits my blog now, ._.

Finished Art already, so pretty much of a relief.
The stress always torments me. >(
But now it's overrr. :]

Hmm. The week after Sept hols was quite alright? I always thought this period of time was supposed to be like zomgomgstudystudystuffmyselfwithworkteachersgonnapushpushpush kinda situation. But apparently it's not? I guess the problem's with me.

School today was slack day for me. I think I'm getting used to sleeping in class. That. is. BAD. But how, I'm tired, my eyelids will automatically feel heavy and drop. I can't concentrate, my mind keeps drifting off, I feel like sleeping. So plop.
Mrs Chin is a funny (weird) person.
She wants people to write a letter of apology to her cuz they laughed in class. Okay I was laughing too but I dunno why she didn't call out my name, I feel a little bad towards my other three friends. Cos we were about to play. Lol. But then it's not like we HAHAHHAHA, we just haha. You get what I mean? Like we didn't laugh loudly like nobody's business. I think she is mentally challenged.

Dilemma dilemma dilemma.
This word frequently pops up in my dictionary.
I'm stuck.
I don't know what to do.
Let nature take it's course? Maybe.

One month more to O's. I'm lagging wayyyy behind on revision. Must start after this week. Promise myself that.
I wonder.. How can I improve on my A math? Spam do TYS? Practise everyday? Omg.
Anywayzzz. I've alrd drawn out a time table like.. three weeks ago. I'm totally not following what I planned. -.-

This goes on and you'll find me not bothering to even explain anymore.

That's all for now. Byeeee.

2009-08-30T19:15:00.003+08:00

I have just gotten off a rollercoaster.
Okay maybe like.. five days ago.
I've been so emotional that whenever whatever bad stuff came, I just got all sad and discouraged and cried.
It was sickening.

I decided to look on the bright side.. I managed to.

My prelim results are the worst results I have ever gotten so far.
Prelims are not gonna play any single part in O levels anyway.

So from now on, I have to work hard!
And I'm currently feeling pretty happy, cos I've done Math and painted my Art piece! ( like finally )

My hair is getting a little too long.
I'm having the thought of cutting it short. Short as in having short hair.
LOL.
I'm a little bored of this hairstyle as I have said many times. But if I cut short, I think I need to rebond it.
And I have begun to appreciate my wavy hair already.
And my mom told me I could rebond it at the end of the year if I want to.. she didn't like the idea in the past.

Teachers Day celebration tmrw. Good luck everybody. And to dance girls, have energy and remember steps and SMILE :D

Okay mannn I'm gonna go batheee.
Goodbye!

2009-08-10T21:34:00.003+08:00

My blog's like dead.
Because I haven't been online all this while.

Anyway I've got my Green Day album last week and I have the poster on mah wall hohoho. BYE XIAOZHU I'M SO SORRY. (okay maybe not)

Prelims nowww. And I'm pretty done revising Physics. I'm not confident of an A though. Mixed up with some of the formulas esp work done and all that shitzxz.

Who knows what we should revise on History? HUH????
I've got no friggin clue.

Maybe... I should skip the tuition tmrw and stay in school to study. Tmrw's Science anyway. Shall ask mommaaa. But oops I haven't handed in the fees. The new guy there is VERY WEIRD I DONT LIKE HIM HE WALKS AROUND OUTSIDE OUR ROOM FOR NO FUCKIN REASON IT'S DAMN DISTURBING AND GIVES THAT "HEHEHE LITTLE KIDS I'M A GOOD GUY DONT WORRY I'M HERE TO HELP YOU GUYS" LOOK. Ugh. And he's those typical type of person who tries too hard to be friendly you feel like giving him a bloody punch on his face. Like, he puts his arm around my teacher's shoulder and gives that sinister smile.. That time he came in the room to ask if we're interested in some motivational talk.
I think motivational talks are.. LOL. Shall not talk abt it any further.

We had this awesome discussion about * and laughed like hell.

" blerghghblablar" use the electric shock gun zap.
Sit on the wheelchair and suddenly got up to walk. OMG HE CAN WALK AGAIN!
HAHAHAHA.

Ooops sorry I got too carried away. BUT MY DA MAO WILL KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABT HAHAHA.

-

Bye :]

2009-07-26T21:08:00.000+08:00

Recently I always see and think of sleep.
I see people sleeping. I sleep. They feel like sleeping. I feel like sleeping. We sleep.

-
On Friday, went to Dance Studio with Mavis the ant and Cassandra.
Learnt two eights for fun..
I MISS DANCING.
I miss standing in front of the mirror doing the same thing over and over til we get it right.
I miss panting and perspiring like crazy.
I miss the feeling, you get it ugh.

Left at like 5 and met Jo and watched some no atmosphere basketball playing downstairs.
Holy Innocents' is not a church. Hahaha.

-

I've got like so much mathematics to do!
HOW I WISH ONE DAY HAS LIKE 30 MORE HOURS, DAMN! (but of course the 30 hours must not be for school lolll)
Then I can laze my time awayyy, and spend half an hour on 1 stupid question which can be done in like 2 minutes blahblahblah.

I want to listen to new songs. I'm abit bored of what's in my playlist.
I shall buy a new album or two. ^^

-

I might be over my head,
A little over my head but I kinda like it.

2009-07-20T21:22:00.002+08:00

HELLO. I HAVE NOT BLOGGED FOR 14 DAYS ZOMG.

Okay whateva I was just over reacting.

Today our classroom smelt like shit. As in, real poop. The brown solid discharged from your anus. Get it?

-

I feel so imperfect. Although everybody is but...
Yala I think I need to lose weight.

Went swimming on Fri and ystd.
On Friday, I was so focused and continued my(boring) journey towards the end of the pool when I suddenly see an ah pui swimming towards me in the opposite direction saying " Hey fatty! "

It was my dad. ._.

-
I couldn't recall how it was possible for me to swim 10 laps for warm up and 32 laps later when I was coached. Or sometimes full speed for like consecutive i-don't-know how many friggin laps.

I get a little tired after swimming just 1 pathetic lap of freestyle now. Major deprovement. Ughhh.

But anyway, I swam 26 laps on Fri and 18 ystd so not bad liao hor.

-

Crystal must chiong for Art if not she's gonna dieee.
I want this to be over quick lah wo de tiannnn.

2009-07-06T21:59:00.003+08:00

Helloooozz.

Me had an enjoyable Youth Day. How about you? :]

"I remember every second spent with you."
Hahaha, how cute. :]

2009-06-28T16:41:00.009+08:00

I am soooo not ready for school.

Other than uncompleted work, I just don't feel like going to school yet.

): Bad bad.

I don't feel like doing Art. Honestly speaking I'm going nowhere. Ughhh this sucks most.

And then the WLCD's work is the most !%$#wugui^* of all cuz it serves no purpose. Tell me what has commenting on your classmate's powerpoint presentation, writing all the bullcrap about comparing two essays from the reader's digest help?

Maybe she's trying to give us something different but to me it's worse than giving us normal exam scripts to do.

Anyway. Look at diiizssz.

Your fatty prawning ;)

Hahaha kay forget about it(her). Went prawning on Wednesday! Mua first time ehehehe. So in the bus we ohpaysohm and then Taiyang's with Peirong and Shaokiat's with me.

Ah rice says he looks 阳光 here. Omg~

Guess how much we caught after 3 hours? :D

....

.......

................

......

............................

WAHAHAHHA.

There's still more. :DD

....

..........

.....................

..........

............................

WAHAHAHHAHA x2

MUAHAHAHHAHAHAHAokay I shall stop dreaming.

THIS. IS. REALITY.

....

This is reality baby! ):
Hahahha this one's ours. Pei and Yang caught 6 too.

See the 4th prawn? She's pregnant the orangey stuff are her eggs!

The previous ones I showed with much more prawns are from nice people who purely came to catch the prawns for fun and not to eat them, and they gave them to us. Wahahahha.

Sk showing how to poke the stick through them Ouch.

Imma eat you sucker stop movin!

Wheeeee! :D

We had like 60+ prawns to ourselves in the end, but gave away some cos it was really too much.

Ah. Not eating anymore prawns for the moment. Still recovering. Hahaha.

-

Rest in peace Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett! The day when MJ died and my Dad saw it on the com and told me, I thought he was lying to me. I've always appreciated some of his songs and the way he dances. Natural talent.

Death could be so sudden.

-

I can't seem to arrive at the best decisions.
I just feel a little tired of what's around me.

This shouldn't be the way.

2009-06-22T16:48:00.002+08:00

My com is some weird shit. It flashes and hangs. -.-

-

Anyway. Steamboat on last Friday! I stuffed myself with mostly, prawns? Hahaha. I've never really liked prawns but the more I eat the more I want.

Cos we realised we don't talk a lot when we eat, and it's not a good thing when everybody's keeping quiet while eating their own food especially when it's buffet steamboat, Peirong and Shaokiat came up with a topic to talk about - What's attractive about each one of us. (LOL)

Tummies were big after we ate. Shaokiat's one was like this typical bloated round tummy. Taiyang's one don't need to say lah. I don't dare to see even if she wants to show me.

We took neoprints and I almost fell from the seat in the neoprint machine and had my hand slammed on the wall and I was like AHH and Taiyang was like :O and Shaokiat just grabbed whatever of me was nearest to him - my ankle.
Peirong that aunty counting money is it? I forgot. Hahahha.

-

Bah I am so not prepared for how my dad's gonna react and if my water tap's gonna automatically flow and flow and flow. Actually it's good. Flow em all you want and they'll gradually stop flowing after time. Flow.

Dark chocolates help to make people feel happier. Great I shall spam eat them.

At it again.

2009-06-15T16:54:00.002+08:00

I have like 2 more compos to write. If there wasn't the message today I could have feigned ignorance and told Mr Anba that he didn't mention when to hand in the compos but now it seems like everybody has to do it.

Science tuition tmrw. Me gna see some siao char boh again and laughing my ass off looking at her arguing w the teacher.
No... The siao char boh isn't me. >)

I love my dark purple nailssszxzxzzzzz.
I don't want to clean it off. So what if there's schl tmrw. >D

Third week of hols. And I'm left with work from all the subjects. I did a few of them alrd though. Heh. Must complete all by this weeeeek!

-

I had the urge to tell you that I love you when you walked out of the door. :/

My happy pill.

2009-06-10T23:02:00.003+08:00

I should stop eating chocs. I should watch the amount of junk food I eat. I should eat less Taiyang stuff and eat more veg and fruits. I should exercise more.

Damn. I. Dislike. Having. Periods.
I get this minor pimple outbreak on my T-Zone.
Then, I want to eat.
I want to eat chocs.
I want to eat sweet/salty stuff.
I constantly feel like munching on stuff.
I feel sleepy or tired.
I shit more often.
I get impatient.
I feel like the whole world owes me.
I can blow for just small reasons which when I think back about it, I was being ridiculous.
I tend to be more sensitive to what people say and how they behave.
Therefore I get more emotional.
And in the end when I think back about it, I was being too wu liao.

...

Now I feel like eating the peanut butter choco cookie right infront of me which tastes awfully sweet. No I have not eaten it, I ate it before.

Anywayyyyy.
Hols = any other weekend.

Damn I really feel like eating the cookie!
Exercise self control I can do it yes.

And now I don't feel like blogging anymore because I know I'm going to further type a bunch of bullcrap.

Oh and I really really appreciated what you've done. Thanks Jo! :D
Okay the above isn't bullcrap. Byeeee.

Watch your behaviour.

2009-05-29T21:50:00.003+08:00

This year's Sports Carnival was...

not exciting, for me.

There's like not any strong team spirit or stuff like that anymore this year.
No more Falcons Oi~ or such.

I think I was indeed behaving like a whiny wild bitch today.
Criticizing and complaining mode and all was totally on. I don't think it's normal. I feel so... disappointed with myself?

Anyway Falcons managed to get 2100+ points in the end! :D Which was unexpected cos we initially had like 670+ points? Three cheers!

-

I still don't know how I scored for English, -.-
But I do really hope I pass!

You know if I pass English my L1B4 would have improved from 23 points in Term 1 to 14 points now?! Mwaha.

BUT YOU KNOW WHAT.

...

I DON'T GET ANY ENCOURAGEMENT OR PRAISES AT ALL.
My overall, significant improvement have failed to earn recognition just because of two other subjects I screwed up.

My E math. I got an A1 this time instead of the B3 I had last term.
My Art. From a C5 to a B3.
My Combined Science. From a C5 to a B3.
My Combined Humanities. From a B4 to an A2.

Nothing said about all that.

While on the other hand, my A math and Higher Chinese, which I both scored a D7 for, received all the attention. I seriously don't like this.

I know I have to be nagged at cos I've made no improvement in my A math and I failed my Higher Chinese which I have never, but the feeling sucks when you're quite happy for yourself and the people you'd like most to be happy for you isn't.

Now tell me, what should I do? Get A1s for all my subjects til I hear what I want and deserve to?

Of course, don't get me wrong. I'm not working for the encouragement or the praises.
I just feel I deserve some of it this time round, really. Don't you think?

2009-05-24T17:41:00.004+08:00

Exams overrr. Yadadada. I haven't got back all my results. But I failed Higher Chinese. Funny part is that I got one question correct out of the ten for zong he tian kong. Urgh.

But I think overall I would have improved since term 1.

Was supposed to play Captain's Ball on Thursday but they had it postponed due to the weather. So much for being excited.

-

_l_ to my last performance in school. Embarrassing shit I was totally clueless of what to do when we realised it was the wrong music. But still, I think we did okay for the second time.

We had a debate for LCE and I've got an essay to write cuz I made a casual remark saying Mrs *** couldn't be on the 4th floor cos she's an elderly. LOL.

Watched them played basketball for heats after school. Way to go Falcons! :D
Then was Floorball. I totally had no confidence cos I didn't know how to play but well.. :]

-

Don't know why I was feeling blue yesterday. I don't know if I'm being too sensitive. That remark rings in my ears now and then. I don't feel good knowing I'm not. As I thought deeper, I realised I start to feel insecure. I lost the confidence I should have, the confidence I had.

And how am I able to not compare when reality is like this. I feel pathetic.

But anyways, felt good to have a listening ear around. Thanks. :]

Two Happy.

2009-05-03T19:12:00.006+08:00

Happy Birthday 19th Birthday Bro! :D

I am more relieved now. :]

Cuz why, I'm completing my Art! But whether or not it's up to standard or REALLY completed, I wouldn't know. But it's considered as MYE, so it's one down. MYEMYEMYE. I have got no drive to do revision. But I read a little on Physics on Friday. Okay psst I shouldn't get nerdyyy.

I've been feeling pretty relaxed these three days. Taking things pretty slow and easy. Schl's tmrw so I hope I don't laze around anymore.

I went to a Mosquito's hideout on Thursday. I got 7 mosquito bites just by spending 1h30mins there.

Anyway, recent pictures:

Momma's Birthday. :]

Do we look alike? :o

Free cone day! :D

The one I was having in this pic is the coffee one if I'm not wrong. Loads of choc chunks. Me like. :D
This is mah Macadamia nut! Their nuts are also in the ice cream and coated with choc. Me like x2. :D

Hahahah last week @ Pepper lunch. They were trying to do "Moo". My two dearest friends please don't kill me if you see this.

Kay lah to be fair let me post an ugly pic of me and Shaokiat:

Sibeh retarded. Gawd my face is so damn round. Oh did I mention I practically LOLed at Shaokiat's specs when I first saw him with it? So Lao sin seh looking! Hahahaha.

Shaokiat and I were doing the LOL and the WOW.

Kay that's enough.

-

Cause it's you and me,
and all of the people with nothing to do, nothing to lose.
And it's you and me, and all of the people
and I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off you.
This clock never seemed so alive.

Imma bathe nowwww. Bye :]

2009-04-26T15:12:00.002+08:00

I am trying to remember what happened for the past 13 days.
I only know I've not used the com for 13 days!

Okay, I shall not talk so much about what happened that people might already know, but I'm happy about it cos we achieved a Gold in SYF! I was really pleasantly surprised cos I thought we'd get a Silver or smth. Mwaha rejoice!

And yesterday we went for our competition at Sembawang CC.
Though we got nothin' but hey all of us tried our best! And we did pretty good right :]

Only last night after I had my shower, it dawned upon me that it was our last performance already. I heard we're going to perform at National Day, but who knows? It's gonna feel weird without the practices. I'd like to thank every single one of us cos we made it work, despite of the unexpected problems.
I'll miss the times we spent together, panting heavily and complaining about the heat and how tired we are. I'll remember the times we laughed, bitched and did stupid stuff together. Good memories. :]
Also, we have to really really thank Clare for what she did for us.

I'll post piccas up the next time round when I'm more free.

-

Be humble. It applies to everyone. If you guys are at it again, I shall whip out the 1 dollar and the 50 cent coin. (inside joke)

I do give in sometimes but don't you try to walk over me. I hope everything is going to be fine for you.

2009-04-12T17:08:00.003+08:00

It has been a busy week. Filled with homework, CCA and afternoon programs. I have like, barely enough time for myself to daydream, even at home. Though sometimes I do slip away unintentionally while doing homework, or in class. Hahaha.

Anyway, my mom nags at me everyday. And I really mean it, everyday. What does she get in the end? I mean I can't reply her a " No I won't do my homework you stfu " and I won't anyway. That's rude. But point is, she always gets nods and "Ya"s from me and in the end I really do complete work ( most of the time ). It's like she's not even tired at telling me all the same shit everyday. But hey, I AM TIRED of listening to all that. Without her reminding me, I would automatically do my stuff, it's the matter of time when I will do it.
And even sometimes, when I am already doing my homework right in front of her, she can tell me to complete more work after I've finished what I'm doing. -.-
Hurray man, seriously.

-

On a brighter note, I got my Ultra Touch! Thanks mom! Now it's time to see whether my 100 bucks would stay or go. Hahaha. I hope it stays.

School tmr! SYF on Wednesday! AHHHHH.
And damn I forgot to stretch! My sit and reach! AHHHH.
-

It seems necessary now, I'm sorry.

2009-04-04T10:21:00.002+08:00

Hello. I am a girl who looks fierce if I don't smile. WHY?!

LOL. Okay it was bloody warm for the past two days, and I felt sleepy also. The heat kinda affected my mood a little. And plus I didn't really get what Miss Tan was explaning to us and I was trying to think hard. So I guess I was pek-chek. And after lesson Miss Tan says she doesn't dare to look at me cos my face black black and I look fierce! D:

So I look fierce when I'm angry. I look fierce when I'm tired. I don't look approachable if I don't smile, is that it? ):

Thank God (if You exist) for giving me a face like that.

Hahaha but it isn't a bad thing for me. I mean it wouldn't kill me to smile and normally you would probably see me smiling or laughing. So yeah :]

We're born to smile!

-

Kay enough of that. We're going for our SYF rehearsal tmr! And gah SYF's in 11 days. 11 days! That's like less than 2 weeks. ohemjeeeeeeeee. Go girls go girls!

2009-03-31T17:24:00.002+08:00

Whee I got A for my 2.4 km run whee whee whee.
Happy. :D

This is finally, after 3 years, an A I've gotten for 2.4km run. Mwahahahahahaha.

I hope I get at least a C for sit and reach really. Hahahha. Mavis! Give me some of your flexibility!

My target for myself is 28. Hahhaha. Don't underestimate me. :]

-

I was damn sleepy yesterday. I was reading chem halfway and my eyes were shut. And I actually called people pigs. Hahahaha.

-

I want a new phone. This spare shit from my bro keeps lagging. I want UltraTouch but da maomao chouchou and youbaiyoufeiyoubudongzaikannali says it doesn't really suit me but it is a nice phone! Wo yaoooo.

-

Okay I gotta zao liao.

Marshmallow your head.

2009-03-29T22:41:00.002+08:00

Whoops. Sorry for the lack of updates. I have been pretty busy. I believe all sec 4s are pretty busy anyway -.-

This whole week has been pretty alright. Like more good things happened. Actually I will be contented enough if nothing bad happens. :D
But I've been getting easily tired lately. And I always feel like eating stuff. I don't want to gain weight anymoreeeee. Dance will help to burn off right. Hell yeah.

Most of the time after we give it all for the dance, some of us would be lying on the floor gasping for oxygen. E.g: Me.

Went to pay respects to my grandpa today. And there were loads of people. Freaking humid and judging by the weather from the morning to afternoon today, you will know how roasted I felt. x_X

I love dinner at home on Sundays! Home cooked food, yum-yum. :D

2009-03-16T21:59:00.002+08:00

I finished my chinese ppt alrd. Whee. whee. WHEE.

Kay so now for hols homework, the most major one I'm left with is Art.
Ughhhh don't feel like doing!

And now my mom has to spoil my mood by pushing me to do other homework. Hello, I've just completed an assignment you *** okay I take back my words.

-

This is just great manzzz. -.-
Shush.

Hmm? :]

2009-03-15T22:06:00.004+08:00

Yowww. Content below not suitable for er.. Actually it's suitable. Hahahah. Just a lame msn convo between my bro and I when he was in his room and I was in mine.

€LLu$IoNiSt™ says:
ur DP sucks
kissing ur Ipod

`Crystal } Who knew. says:
better than yours lah

€LLu$IoNiSt™ says:
wif ur cb face

`Crystal } Who knew. says:
you have lj face

€LLu$IoNiSt™ says:
u have cb face

`Crystal } Who knew. says:
you have the lanjiao lanpa face

€LLu$IoNiSt™ says:
think tpye loud loud sat ah
u cb

`Crystal } Who knew. says:
then you think you type soft soft you big lah
you lj

€LLu$IoNiSt™ says:
not i wan soft, the keyboard like tat

`Crystal } Who knew. says:
not that i want it loud, the com keyboard also liek that
*like

€LLu$IoNiSt™ says:
no leh
is u too much str

`Crystal } Who knew. says:
i can hear you typing you lj
see
i can hear

€LLu$IoNiSt™ says:
cos my keyboard spoiling
3 years liao
and i gaming on my laptop
cos of cos keyboard sure koyak

`Crystal } Who knew. says:
this com almost 4 years alrd.

€LLu$IoNiSt™ says:
but gaming?
and got change keyboard and mouse somemore

`Crystal } Who knew. says:
the com keyboard loud also not i want.
you lj

€LLu$IoNiSt™ says:
the com also not gaming de

`Crystal } Who knew. says:
you're just jealous that mine is louder than yours. Why not you type w bigger strength lah you asshole.

€LLu$IoNiSt™ says:
no leh
;p;
lol
go chat wif ur *** lah

`Crystal } Who knew. says:
aiya shut up la go talk to your xxx.

€LLu$IoNiSt™ says:
or the ***
lol
u onli know her ah
lol
cb

`Crystal } Who knew. says:
i also know ****

€LLu$IoNiSt™ says:
haha
dun wan

`Crystal } Who knew. says:
she dont want you,
not you dont want her

€LLu$IoNiSt™ says:
i wan play liao
u stfu

`Crystal } Who knew. says:
bye you lj

€LLu$IoNiSt™ says:
bye u knnbccb

Hahahah I can't believe we're so childish. Still typing all the short form vulgarities. LOL.

-

Had the family gathering last night. That bitch wasn't there. But her husband was. So he was like telling my mom to buy this cd for me cos there are lots of chim chim english words that I can learn, and his daughters watched it for the second time and took down the words they didn't know to look it up on the dictionary. And then they proceeded to talk about results and all that shitz. Okay, for my own good. But please. Can he just stop talking about that for once? Damn it.

It was quite fun talking to some adults esp aunties. My mom included. Hahahah we're like gossiping about another member of the family and his elder daughter actually being able to get married soon and not the younger one cos she is ugly. Okay we are bad.

-

Anyway, a picture of my 小舅！

Wahahah. He's fixing his teeth this coming week. Don't worry :D

Bye peeps :]

2009-03-14T11:05:00.002+08:00

I'm back home!
Had to go for Math class at 8am today. z_Z
I'm going for a family gathering tonight. Pretty good feeling :D
But the sucky thing is there's gonna be a hypocrite asking for my results. I hope she doesn't turn up. Aiyah but there's still her husband so it makes no difference.

-
Anyway, PTM ystd.
I love my mom cos she understands.
I still love my dad although he doesn't understand.
Okay whatever. I failed English, but the stuff my dad said made me wanna shoot out my middle finger to him.
He says even if I'm getting a 50+ or 60+ for English, he's still gonna think it's not good enough cos everyday we're communicating in English and he knows I read the Newspapers how can I get such a score I needa read more books buck up blabla it's not that the marking is strict it's just all of us are plain lousy and that our standard of English should be better compared to the past cos we're more exposed now and the level is higher. What's so difficult about Comprehension, all the answers are in the passage so if the answer is wrong it just means you don't get the question or the passage.

You can point your middle finger. Now.

-

Kay but I'm pretty glad that my mum didn't give me the silent treatment that I expected. Cos seriously, this is the worse result slip I've ever gotten so far.

I need to take the express x express train for Art. I am way too slow.
Also, aim is to finish holiday homework by Thursday. Whoo. :]

-

This way or that way, your pick.
That or this, my choice.

2009-03-08T16:38:00.002+08:00

Okay. So today's a Sunday and it's like a pretty lazy day. I don't know how to write mua Chinese gong han compo. Shit I forgot to ask my tuition teacher when she came on Friday. Guess I was too tired. You know I spent half the time lying on my bed listening and reading out to her? See, I was tired.

Walao eh I don't feel like drawing any vehicles for art. But since I've alrd decided on it, it's too late to change my mind.

-

We were born to smile.

Thank you you you you you you and you.

Bye :]

Couldn't catch me anyhow.

2009-03-07T23:47:00.003+08:00

Where is my happy pill? You're gone.

So I want Kit-kat but the small shop at the bus stop isn't open for today. Nevermind, I have chocos at home anyway but I want a whole bar to myself.

Went to school for Math class. I couldn't get anything into my head after 9am. I was like basically thinking of other stuff, staring blankly at the whiteboard, sometimes looking at Miss Tan, looking down at what I've copied down... but still, nothing got in my head after 9am.

Went for brunch after that, and off to the playground. I need some form of er.. I don't know. I need to do stuff to get the whole load of shit off my mind. And for that moment, I did.
Zing bought this thingy for 3.90. LOL. I guessed right, he got a triceratops in the end. :]

Had a brief chat w Peirong, Sherman and Zing after that and at first they were discussing whether to smoke that noob guy doing some footwork at the playground. Lol.

-

Mm sometimes I wish I could be a small little kid once more. Who doesn't? I'd be free of all these troubles one would face in the future and my life would be once again devoid of worries. Aiyah but everybody has to grow up one fine day so here I am.

-

Cos either way you're gonna think what you believe.
I can't stand the way you act, I just can't comprehend.

2009-03-05T22:23:00.003+08:00

Peirong is right. This is indeed a bad week.
I didn't agree cos I was pretty fine on Monday when she said that.

But on Tuesday, I felt it.
Wednesday, which is yesterday, will be the worst day of the first three months of 2009 for me.
Today is just this teeny weeny bit better than yesterday. I wonder how I will take tomorrow.

Cheer up girls! I know my good friends are feeling almost as shitty as I am, esp today.

I know my eyes are feeling tired so I really hope I can manage to fall asleep tonight.

I am in need of goodgood hugs so I can cry my eyeballs out.

Call the shots.

2009-02-28T11:56:00.002+08:00

Hello! I've just finished tuition.

Lol.

-
Anywayyyy. Cross Country yesterday. Rahh so disappointed cos I could've gotten into top 20. But so what? I didn't. Nevermind about that alrd.

Headed to CompassPoint for lunch. Pizza! :D
Were chatting for quite abit and all Taiyang did was just concentrating on cutting the stupid pizza and not understanding what we were talking about and giving the pig huh face when she looked up.

Go to the other table lah.

-

Went to catch "He's just not that into you" with Yiwen, Pei, JL, Nicholas and Andrew @ Cathay.
Pretty interesting show but it was just okay to me. Three stars.

Was feeling tired after the movie, don't know why either.

Waliew eh smth wrong with the USB connection I can't upload pictures. T.T

You, stop acting.
You, stop deliberately doing all that.
It's just getting you nowhere.

2009-02-24T17:32:00.002+08:00

I felt good in the morning. Cos I managed to run two times outside the school without stopping. Wait, it might seem nothing to you but it's something to me cos I think I've never tried running all the way like this. Am I noob? Yeah maybe. Hahahahha.

Anyway, I've got science tuition later on w maomao! Did I mention the teacher's funny? :]

-
I liked last Saturday too. Went for CIP in the morn and swimming @ Sherman's house in the mid afternoon. Mavis has a flat tummy and Sherman has only skin, bones, and def some muscles. Nigel is fat. Lol.

Go with my heart but so? I think I'd make wrong choices if I really did that and not follow what my head's telling me.

So go on, make things happen.

2009-02-15T15:31:00.002+08:00

Hello people!

Nothing much I've got to say but just recently I get really fed up with myself for whatever reasons. But when such situations happen I have no one to blame but myself? I can't stop it either. So too bad. I feel lousy.

Wake up Crystal Lim you stupid bitch.

Bye.

Mindwhirrrl.

2009-02-07T23:37:00.004+08:00

So went to Ong Lai's house today. Gambled abit...
The most I think I lost around 4 bucks? Or maybe lesser. Hahaha.
Got only one Blackjack today. But better than nothing anyways. :D

Watched Inkheart later on. I didn't really enjoy it. Firstly there were stupid people sitting around us they were like talking so loudly and consistently it pissed the hell out of me.
I actually wanted to turn and tell Peirong, " Hey Janice, very noisy hor? "
Cos I didn't want them to know Peirong's real name. But on second thought I was afraid Peirong didn't get it and not reply me so I would be like a retard talking to myself.

So I just said, " Very noisy hor? " So obviously they didnt care and continued. I heard Taiyang saying that they even threw popcorn around and it kept falling on her. Man if I were her I'd not be so nice to only tell them to lower down their volume lor.

Secondly, it is not a good movie to me. Crappy storyline. I mean all of that is fiction I understand, but it isn't reasonable. It's like... so easy. Like you just take a pen and re-write and find a Silver Tongue person to read all that shit out and you can change facts. Made all the stuff happen before seem redundant.

To sum it up, I don't really like it. Yeah.

Thinking of school makes me want to have sufficient rest because I'm busy! Hahaha.

-

This is so confusing. So please, you either prove it or just stay away okay.

Angry me.

2009-02-04T20:44:00.002+08:00

Two fucked up days. Yesterday and today.

No no, or should I say I was feeling fucked up?
But it was stuff that made me feel that way so... yeah whatever.

Anyway I wuz feeling better after lunch today so pretty alright I guess.
But I can't stop the things running through my mind.

Self expectations and some other stuff. Blablabla.

Right now I think I was wrong. It didn't change a bit.

2009-01-31T17:21:00.004+08:00

I am back! Didn't come online lately so thus I didn't get to blog.

Anyway Happy CNY you all! :D

Did the usual stuff during the public holidays...
Hmm but except I wasn't really happy during this CNY period. Like I get really f-ed up half of the time.
I lost 8 bucks in total! O.o I've never lost when gambling w my family during CNY. Guess it isn't my year.
Hahahah but I won around half of it back on Thursday!.
Anyway I burnt a hole in my pocket this month. Buying birthday prezzies and all.
And I only received like 5 or 6 ang baos this year... excluding the two my parents gave moi. T.T
Thing is my angbao money always go straight to the bank. I can't even sniff it.

-

Anyway on 29th it was the humongous ol' fat pig's birthday!
Happy Belated Birthday (here) Taiyang! :D
I hope you like your prezzies! Okay well I think you did since you gasped in exhilaration after going into your class and seeing your brand new bag and running like a wild boar towards your classroom door with tears of joy/surprise.
Okay I'm not writing a compo here but it's true. Hahahah.

Me hope you like the card I made and passed to you one day late! Soz was really tired on Wednesday so yeap. Hahahaha.

-

Bababa.
I was actually fine until yesterday I felt pain somewhere inside my nose connecting to the throat. Okay lah I don't know what I'm saying but I just felt pain.
So oolala fell sick today. Having body aches. Sweating cold sweat now. I hate this. Everytime I swallow my saliva or smth, my inside-of-the-nose-connecting-to-the-throat will hurt. ):

Wish me well peepo! Heh.

Last day of January so Happy Birthday again to my Jan babies! :D

Rama-lama bang bang.

2009-01-22T20:51:00.002+08:00

Okay. Quick short post before mama comes back.

-

First time in my life I wore contact lenses today! Hahaha. My right eye felt a little bit uncomfortable... but it was alright. Heh.

My waist would hurt tmr. Wanna bet? ;)

Make it work.

2009-01-19T18:01:00.002+08:00

Oo-la obviously my mom didn't tell my dad I found out abt the com's pw.

Oh yah I got locked outside of the house yesterday when I happily came back home and realised that I didn't bring my keys with me -.-

Nobody was at home, so I called to tell my mom.

Later on she returned my call asking where I am, and after I told her I was directly at our doorstep alrd, she said, " Okay lor you go buy bread for me. "

=.=

So of course I went out to buy bread right. I'm gonna be laughed at if my neighbours walk past me or smth. And there's nothing to do.

Walked walked walked. Saw a Cai Shen Ye right at the door of 7-eleven. LOL. I was like talking to Yiwen and then there was this big-sized guy in red. With the hat. He was approaching people for something but I'd rather make my way to Srgn Central so I did.

Kay anyway the main point is that I got locked out and I saw a person dressed up as a Cai Shen Ye. End of story.

Si-beh pain.

2009-01-17T12:01:00.002+08:00

My neck hurts a whole frickin bloody ass bloody hell lot.
And my back.

Should not be easy for me, I think.
I think I have to keep watching the youtube video for SYTYCD season 2's Top 10's performance in order to feel it and get it in my head.
Reminds me of Disturbia though. Hahahaha.

Anyway me happy! I used the 20bucks voucher I received yesterday to buy two CD albums!
Beyonce's and Ne-Yo's.
But Year Of The Gentleman was labelled as Good Music so it was just $11.90.
At first I took Pink's one but Funhouse was $16.95? Would be a waste for the other 3 bucks so I took Beyonce's.

Hehe bought contact lenses yesterday! Cos I complained and whined to my mom how my spectacles would fling around when I'm dancing and if I take it out I see no shit. :]

-

My mom is planning to call up LCD. (lai-chui-dip) To ask about my normal chinese higher chinese drop no drop shit thing.
I'm pretty confused.

To people who bought the remaining tix of Breakout before I did, I don't like you! :(

-

your hobby: lying.

2009-01-13T17:05:00.002+08:00

It sure feels good to have the com password without my parents knowing. :]

School has started for 11 days. It feels like almost a month to me.
I am beginning to lose focus during lessons. Damn.
I don't know what to do for Art! I can't have all those simple stuff I usually come up with already. Think. More.

Ah. History test tmrw.

Oops, shaky shaky~